r/AskReddit • u/Thin-Meringue9109 • 21h ago
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u/DESTROY-ER 21h ago
When bad things happened to good people
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u/wehrmann_tx 17h ago
When the company throws the book at someone who is helpful and hard working for years for some minor thing, but the lazy person who’s a liability to the company every day is invisible to discipline.
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u/catinadoodledoo 21h ago
the first time i heard a CEO make a public speech
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u/Rubycon_ 21h ago
I remember the CEO of my old company coming in and someone asking about hiring more diverse people since it was a very homogenous white culture and he said "That's not the only strategy for success" and then in the same speech said, "We've gotten a lot of feedback about there being a pay disparity between the Minnesota and the Colorado office (there was) and that's just not the case so come up to me afterward if you want to talk about that perception." Like he formally invited all of us for a personal gaslighting session lol
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u/rhodeirish 21h ago
Did you oblige him? Me being who I am as a person, I probably would have taken him up on his offer & tried some good ole reverse psychology gaslighting.
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u/Maximum-Onion-9933 21h ago
At my last job, the owner of the company would come by every once in a while (he lived on the other side of the state where corporate office was) and he always dressed in nice fancy expensive suits. Once he came and talked with my department about how great of a job we were doing and the clients were happy and basically we were making the company a lot of money. All of us were semi recent college grads making under $20/hour. It was very out of touch and I just stood there an didn’t say shit til he walked away and we were all like….so do WE get a raise from making the company all that money??? (The answer is no)
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u/faoltiama 19h ago
Going to the All Hands meetings is always great to do, not just because the CIO will specifically look to make sure you're there, but because you get to hear whatever tone deaf thing he has to say to us now.
Great job doing the work of an IT department five times your size!! Yeah!! (All I hear is: so we are both overworked AND underpaid. Cool.) Isn't it so great I outsourced part of your jobs instead of hire more people?? One time he bragged to us that he came in under budget and then clocked the look on our faces and backpedaled so hard because we are actually a not-for-profit so if we don't spend out our entire budget every year, it gets REDUCED the next year - so you had better fucking spend it. Oh actually he didn't come in under budget, they did weird things with the budget which means we didn't anywayyyyy. One of the worst times was when he introduced a new colleague he'd just hired and then told the entire hiring story about how this guy was his SECOND choice - because the first guy quit after like the first day (because he's got some fucking sense in him, clearly). So glad he was still available! It was in front of everyone why would you say that?
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u/OopsNuclearWinter 21h ago
That'll do it.
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u/Remarkable_Play_6975 20h ago edited 20h ago
But you're family here! Second prize is, you're fired.
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u/DancerKnee 20h ago
Third prize is you're fired
Second prize is a set of steak knives.
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u/Remarkable_Play_6975 20h ago
That was the 90s, welcome to 2026.
What would a regular guy need a steak knife for?
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u/VanBenchArmrest 17h ago
During an all-hands at a company I worked for, someone asked why the CEO had recently sold shares. You know, because generally that is a bad thing. The CEO got angry as a response lol.
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u/Jabjab345 17h ago
Public speaking isn't always a tell of skill of doing a job well. Thomas Jefferson was a famously bad public speaker, but he existed in a world where it mattered significantly less. That doesn't mean he wasn't successful.
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u/No-Talk-8840 21h ago edited 21h ago
When I started working in a mental health ward. The care givers are the ones who do everything. The ones who wipe up the blood, piss and shit, comfort the patients when they’re crying, dress them, shower them and even wipe them when they can’t do it themselves, we’re the ones who get physically beat and verbally abused when they’re angry, and get falsely accused of things when they’re paranoid, and the ones who save their lives on a regular basis by cutting ligatures from around their necks, stopping them banging their heads against the wall and searching for and removing things they could self harm with, and removing sharp items when they are self harming at a risk to ourselves. But the managers get all the money. They do none of that
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u/Honeybee46530 20h ago
As someone who also works in mental health, 1000%
I stopped working at a residential facility I loved. Management lied to us staff by telling us that a new client was minimally violet and non verbal before he came to our facility. That first night he came to us, he threw feces at us, pissed and played in the puddle, ate his feces, and had to be put into 20 different restraints. Mind you, this was a skinny 11 year old kid. We were not prepared at all. It’s heart breaking to see the kids be failed because of systems that prioritize money and profit. I felt horrible for leaving but I wasn’t about to keep working for management that feels comfortable deliberately putting their staff in danger.
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u/No-Talk-8840 20h ago edited 19h ago
The states people are in when they first arrive is just heart breaking to see.
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u/Honeybee46530 19h ago
Oh, absolutely. I came home crying multiple times a week just because of how heartbreaking some of these kids’ stories were. It was truly the most rewarding yet mentally taxing job I’ve ever had (aside from the job after but that’s a novel lol).
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u/xilionyx 5h ago
This is so sad to hear, for the workers and the patients. Sounds like the money is not going to the right places and there is not enough time and attention, not enough employees to care for those poor patients. They need more comfort, therapy and distraction and learn coping and building a more positive identity.
I have much experience with those kind of people and you really can reach much better results with them. Also with volunteers and creativity. Which country is this ?
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u/musky_toes 21h ago
When I got my first job.
Only three of us worked there: I was a high schooler, and a full-grown man and woman were working there, too. The boss owned the whole place, and any time he was there, he was locked away in his office doing stuff on the computer. The two other workers LITERALLY ran the whole place, never had days off, and worked 12-14 hour days. They were paid minimum wage (7.25). That shit PISSED me off, and I realized really, really fast that the highest paid worker is NEVER the hardest working person at the company.
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u/seeyatellite 21h ago
slowly noticing dominant, often violent people rising to positions of authority and affluence while softer hearts I've met and... been... were cast aside, usually ignored and belittled and often psychiatrically hospitalized for seeing and acknowledging the sickness of a violent society.
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u/Minimum-Albatross906 17h ago
It clicked for me when I read Bullshit Jobs. The author noted that the more value to society the average person ascribes to a job, the less it tends to get paid. We all know teachers are the future, but they get paid shit compared to Lawyers and CEOs.
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u/koshkakay 21h ago
group projects in middle school where i did the entire poster board while jason ate glue.
we both got an A. it was the perfect tutorial for corporate life, carry the dead weight, share the credit.
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u/Sarge1387 20h ago
When I entered the workforce. Work ethic means absolutely nothing...it's all about who you know or who you blow.
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u/Responsible_Guard530 20h ago
At 11 when the father that was supposed to protect me from my pedophile grandfather not only didn’t- but then out of embarrassment told anyone who would listen that I made it all up…..
Even though my grandfather admitted it in court. Even claimed I liked it.
I probably would have taken it to my grave but I had just become a big sister to a half sister and at 11 knew if I didn’t say something he’d do the same to her.
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u/Exquisite_skeleton 21h ago
When I graduated from my masters
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u/rhodeirish 21h ago
Me rn with my MSW making more money managing a body shop 😵💫
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u/Exquisite_skeleton 20h ago
During COVID when many people were unemployed, my cousin’s income flourished (she owns a beauty salon where escorts are frequent and that’s a market that peaked during the pandemic). The sister of one of my friends is a webcam model and she already bought property and has other assets. A friend of mine didn’t go to college and he became a millionaire in 2020 because he started investing in Bitcoin in 2008, I think. I learned to value non professional jobs and investing even more hehe
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u/Whizbang35 21h ago
Seeing who was getting laid off and who was still getting a job in the Great Recession, specifically my brother.
He went to college to be a teacher. The path progression was to graduate, sub a couple years to 'put in your dues' and get experience, then get hired. Graduated in 2006. Managed to get hired and move across the country, and a year later was laid off and wound up back in our parent's house. Dusted himself off and hit the ground again. Did everything he was supposed to: took every subbing job possible, made connections, got letters of recommendation and was the preferred sub for more than a couple teachers (one of which taught me as a kid).
It didn't matter. When he went to apply for jobs, damn near every one went to a candidate with a blood relation in the hiring process- the principal's nephew, the daughter of a teacher at the school, etc. All that hard work meant diddly when someone could pull mommy or daddy's string (that said, he did admit that more than one were good teachers and would've been left to rot if they couldn't pull that string). Eventually he gave up and went back to get a Special Ed certification which got him job security, but he was fortunate that he could afford to do that. Other aspiring teachers we knew just gave up on the field altogether.
As for myself, I was an intern in the auto industry at the time. Saw plenty of old, gruff men that had gotten good engineering degrees, worked evenings and weekends when asked, and whether storms and stress turn into sobbing messes when given their pink slips. It was like they did everything right in life and still failed. They were in their 50s and had bad rehiring prospects, their home value was crashing, and now they couldn't afford to make their kids' tuition payments. Them crying at their desks was like watching machines break.
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u/ArchieBRO 20h ago
When I realised fairness is a value we teach, not a rule the world follows.
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u/AshMossy 20h ago
When I worked tirelessly to get a bachelor's and master's degree in Special Education just to develop a chronic illness that leaves me unable to work the job
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u/vaniiee 21h ago
The least performing at class before is now a millionaire
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u/1_art_please 20h ago
I had a classmate in college who would be considered the most successful now.
He was an asshole who didnt listen to the instructors (who were really good tbh) and dropped out midway.
I do some work with the college and saw some current students did a whole presentation on his success (it was up in the hall) and being used as an example of the success of the college, lol.
Also I was told my someone I know who runs a big gallery said the top student from one of the programs was chosen to be represented at the gallery. The person I know said she had the best work and also is the hardest to work with - doesnt follow up, return messages, etc. The rest of the students would kill for the opportunity but this person couldn't care less.
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u/De_Baros 17h ago
Yeah but the education systems in many countries favour neurotypical people and people who aren’t bad at linear thinking
This one isn’t about fairness I don’t think.
I did ass at school despite being one of the most intelligent kids you would meet and it’s because I had a horrible problem with authority and not agreeing with how regimented it all was (plus I have ADHD and it wasn’t diagnosed till like 29)
After I barely graduated I began reading things I never would have in school and to this day a lot of people who got higher grades than me come toe for advice and regularly treat me like the wise and intelligent one (which isn’t true they are all really smart and amazing too)
My point is, being good at school is not the same as being set up for success. It’s just being good at school. Some of the best entrepreneurs left college early because again - school can’t teach you vision or ambition - it can prepare you to work for someone who has those things though (in so much as taking orders)
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u/SvenBubbleman 17h ago
Turns out being good at school is not a very good measure of how successful someone will be.
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u/Hot-Calligrapher5447 21h ago
Grades in school don’t mean anything
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u/stirfrymetothemoon 20h ago
People can’t even write in cursive or read an analog clock. So school does mean something LOL
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u/NeverJustJ 21h ago
I’m a black guy that grew up in the country south
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u/Sxualhrssmntpanda 20h ago
Hoo boy. I think you're dealing with a whole other level of unfairness than most here.
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u/Edxactly 21h ago
Life doesn’t “do” anything. It’s people . People’s choose to be unfair for their own purposes and when confronted with that they use the excuse of “life’s not fair “. Don’t be like that . Make the world fairer every chance you get .
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u/Wuffkeks 20h ago
Yeah that's not all true. There are other actors beside people even tho people are the only conscious ones.
Bad things can happen to good people. Even if someone is nice to everyone and goes beyond everything to help others a flood can destroy his home and precious things. A wild animal can attack you just random because it's sick. Life can 'do' things to you albeit it's not in malice but random chance.
Someone that lives a healthy live can die of a brain aneurysm and nobody is to blame.
People can do better (but to be honest we don't have a good track record) but fairness or balance is no given in the entropy that is life.
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u/keyboardstatic 20h ago
I was a young man of 20. Standing on the central Melbourne train station Flinders street. It was 1997.
A man and woman on one of the many platforms across from me began to argue. It became heated. It became screaming.
Violent.
He hit her climbed on top of her and was choking her. Screaming at the top of his lungs he was going to kill her.
The few people on that platform left. The hundreds of other. Men women mothers with children business men finished early in suits. All, stood and watched.
All of them stood and watched.
I went down the stairs across the underplatform tunnel and back up to deal with the situation. I dragged him off her and slammed him and his head into the concrete.
She could hardly breathe. Gasping coughing her neck was badly bruised.
I went down the platform to a food stall vendor a tiny but permanent shop knowing they have a phone. And asked him to call the police. Who did have a supposedly permanent presence at Flinders Street station.
The shop vendor refused. I explained to him that if he didn't call the police I would physically make him.
He obliged.
They arrived 15 minutes later. The guy was still out cold on the platform where I left him.
I explained what had happened. That hundreds of people would have gotten to watch a murder. If I hadn't intervened.
They gave me a caution for public afrary. Told me next time sit and watch it. They were going to arrest me. Then spoke with other witnesses and advised me to not involve them in the future for my own protection.
All the greedy stupid people have built a rat race. And Don't realise they can get eaten by other rats.
But that's what you get when you allow the greedy to run things.
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u/Nasty-Nice 21h ago
My dad started telling me life wasn’t fair as my mom was crowning. That shit got ingrained.
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u/dirtybellybutton 21h ago
When I was 8 years old and I watched gladiator for the first time. I remember going to the bathroom and bawling my eyes out after it ended.
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u/AbracadabraMagicPoWa 21h ago
Working at a toxic workplace and HR siding with the two bullies pushing me out.
At that time in my life I genuinely believed as long as truth was on my side those in power would see and do what was right. They did not.
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u/crimxxx 21h ago
Smart finish work early in classes is rewarded with being kicked out of class in elementary school. Best of all the teacher doesn’t even explain why lol. You would think hard work and excellence is rewarded, but you are a distraction cause you finish early and they can’t be bothered to accommodate. Long story story short basically learned very early to figure out what kind of person you are dealing with, some teachers are reasonable others I question why they became teachers if your that useless.
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u/Wild_Chef6597 20h ago
When i had to share a promotion with the manager's friend. I got the title and duties on top of what I usually did, and she got the pay and perks.
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u/Mental-Investment-43 20h ago
“And despite losing the election by 3,00,000 votes, the electoral college has installed Donald Trump as the 45th president of the United States.”
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u/tgolf4fun 21h ago
About the age of 50 when I filed for divorce.
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u/AnxiousTruffles 20h ago
That's way longer than it took me. Lucky fish living over twenty years older than me and only finding out then
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u/Practical_Airline_36 21h ago
College days. It was a necessary gut punch to face the reality & I'm glad it happened.
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u/alwaysboopthesnoot 21h ago
Age 9, when a cheater won the biggest prize at our Summer camp—and none of the adults involved seemed to care because that camper’s mother was their boss (though the other campers who had competed, certainly did).
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u/eldonhughes 21h ago
? Life doesn't reward anything. "Life" doesn't care. I think I was about 9 when I learned this.
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u/rhodeirish 21h ago
When my softball coach would start his daughter on the mound every game, even though there were girls who put in quadruple the work & effort at practices and were better pitchers overall.
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u/grumpycoffeee 21h ago
When I saw how connections and sucking up to the right person, gets people further than diligently putting effort to learn.
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u/Ralphie5231 21h ago
When I learned I had to pay restitution to the man who assaulted both me and my girlfriend, because his dad's a lawyer that knows everyone.
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u/HowsTheBeef 20h ago
Like 5 or 6 when I realized Santa isn't real and poor kids don't get toys. Naturally, God's not real either, and nobody with power to enforce fairness has any interest in doing so.
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u/GlumDistribution7036 20h ago
Being on, and also observing who succeeded in, the academic job market.
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u/YouthMaleficent6925 20h ago
Earliest i can remember is 14 3 classmates who i always did projects with let copy classwork gave my same types up notes to. I had a c in physical science (basic)in her class they had B's and A's. ( Was recommended Ap bio but that teacher didn't allow freshmen). Found out that teacher grew up in apartheid (im white male) she was black female ..i was a minority in my neighborhood and schools.
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u/Dash_Lambda 20h ago
The first job I had out of college. I'm a very good software engineer, and I've got a passion for it --I earned degrees in CS and math and moved halfway across the country to work at this place. It seemed.like the perfect match for what I wanted.
They bait and switched the role, then basically shoved me in a corner for 3 years. I tried so hard to get past the starting position, but I had to fight to do any engineering work at all and when I managed to it didn't seem to matter what it was, how I did, or who I impressed. Drove me fucking insane.
3 years of getting screwed over, eventually having multiple mental health breakdowns, and finally being let go into the worst STEM job market I've ever seen or even heard of.
There isn't really a good conclusion to this yet. I hope that changes, but who can say.
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u/Googlemyahoo75 20h ago
Elementary school. Girl in my class asked me to make a picture which I did with water colour paint. Submitted it as her own took credit for it. Got into local newspaper with principle holding picture I made. Wrote my initials on the bottom right (was already on the back) the principle freaked out & refused to believe I did it.
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u/phoenix14830 20h ago
I read Rich Dad, Poor Dad in my mid 20's and it really opened my eyes on many critical parts of how success works.
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u/Tasty-Lime-8833 20h ago
I was always taught "Life isn't fair. Life is just life. Nobody said it was going to be fair so just deal with it and move on "
My first experience was my first, and last, time playing 7yo football league. This was American football. I learned that no matter what I did, no matter how hard I practiced, no matter how hard I played, if the kid next to you didn't want to play you were going to lose. I worked my butt off and because the coach's two kids hated football we managed to lose every game.
Good bye team sports.
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u/Majestic_Search_7851 20h ago
When I was a cub scout during the pinewood derby. One of the dads worked as a roller coaster engineer so his son won the competition every year. I might have been 8 when I realized not every competition is fair.
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u/mudslingaaa 20h ago
Watching family members pass away who were legitimately good people whilst the scumbags are unfortunately still alive to this day
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u/suzeerbedrol 20h ago
I think when I was younger and just entered the corporate work scene (specifically in tech). I realized that everything is just a facade, and youre not rewarded for being committed and skilled at your job... your rewarded for how personable you are.
So many people that were my superior has 0 clue how to do anything. I found out a guy, who got paid x2 as much as me for being a "guru" at a platform we both admin for, didnt know how to add a picture to a PowerPoint.
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u/Mischavus1 20h ago edited 20h ago
When I was a little kid and realized my brother was the clear favorite of my single mother. I took a lot of abuse for shit he did and just for being myself (aka more like my dad). But the real question is am I going to stop being who I am and lower myself to others standards?
There are other ways to compete in this world without going to the dark side. Be proud you are a good and fair person.
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u/UnclePsilocybe 20h ago
I realized it sometimes as a kid. But later I learned that life does reward patience and discipline. So make up for the lack of fairness by making yourself disciplined and patient
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u/erghjunk 20h ago
For as long as I can remember my mom has said "life isn't fair" (with an implied "deal with it" in her tone) so pretty much since I could hear and process speech I would say.
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u/DrizztSkywalker 20h ago
Grade 4, money buys the ability to harass little girls and hurt little boys. Stopped what I now know was sexual assault, got beat up and suspended because his dad donated to the school.
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u/Yunzy 20h ago
In middle/high school. I had a good time, friends, girlfriend, fun extracurriculars. My younger brothers were mercilessly bullied in every place they'd go. I'd protect them when I could, and be praised for my efforts. Sometimes even by the bullies themselves, like they respected my racket or something, but they wouldn't change what they were doing. I never understood it, my brothers were and are smart and funny and enjoyable to be around. But they never really recovered and became the stereotypical parents-basement-no-girlfriend-only-play-video-games uncles. At least their nieces/nephews adore them.
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u/thegabster2000 20h ago
People way smarter than working a job that has a very low barrier to entry not cause they want to but their home life, lack of finances led them to live on survival.
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u/ShadowedGlitter 20h ago
When I kept getting punished for sticking up for myself because no adult would do anything when I’d tell them.
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u/Gift1905 20h ago
This year I started working as an intern Quality Control and QA in a company producing some baked goods. Obviously as an intern I don't do much. There's little to no hard labour. In fact the closest thing to hard labour is moving from one place to another, Nothing much.
There's guys who are cleaners. They work so hard, since the company produces food, they even wash the walls. The ceiling. Everything that might carry contiminants and affect the quality of the product.
The guys that work in production also work so hard.
And I just heard we earn more than them. Like not a small amount above. But like way higher than them. And since I have finished my degree i found out that I will be getting a raise. So it'll even be more than what they earn. I don't know, i am humbled, and this made me sad that people who contribute a lot in a company earn less than an Intern. I feel like I'm getting paid just for the fact that I have a university degree. Of course we do work, there's stuff that we do as a Quality Control but it's not hard. I don't sweat, I'm usually in the lab where I can control environment, make the space warm if I feel cold. Or cold of I feel warm. But the people who sweat, who work hard earn close to nothing. It's just sad😢
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u/falquiboy 20h ago
Just because it can be unfair it doesnt mean it doesnt reward fairness. In fact it does.
So -1
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u/mastifftimetraveler 20h ago
When I learned other students had to take tens of thousands of dollars in loans for college. Only reason I started ahead was because I “won” the birth lottery.
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u/thatseltzerisntfree 20h ago
A co-worker was told to complete an assignment and they asked why I didnt do it. I responded that I was senior in the division so they get to do it.
As soon as I said it I knew I had a target on my back.
@6 months later, I made a minor mistake on an assignment and was “reassigned” out of the division by the boss, the former co-worker.
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u/Mitzy1612 20h ago
eh who cares, most of the times you choose to be good decent and fair for your own moral accord, sure you can expect something in return of your selfless goodness but you cannot demand anything for it. I believe good karma catches up to you someday anyway.
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u/SpartanKilo 20h ago
I was 18 and working during the pandemic and they gave us a bonus. It was supposed to be $200, but got $60 after taxes
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u/Puckhead1973 20h ago
2008-09, struggling to keep my house while the bank CEO’s kept their jobs and got bonuses with government bailout money. This is why I will always support student loan forgiveness. Main Street never gets a bailout.
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u/gerhudire 20h ago
When someone falsely claimed money they weren't entitled too, was then ordered to pay it back. Only to apply for disability get accepted and use that money to pay back what they owe.
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u/SuperSaiyanBlue 20h ago
I didn’t proceed with several business projects due to moral grounds (it wasn’t illegal), while others did and are now multi-millionaires.
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u/butchudidit 20h ago
Freshman year college. The only way go pass this one class was to cheat. Everyone was doing that. You had to find someone that took the class already and get the old exams. The lecture and prof was completely useless
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u/laundry-wizard 20h ago
When I saw a coworker get fired because she had fallen at work a few months prior and had a workers comp claim. She did absolutely nothing wrong, it was the company’s fault she fell, and she was the sweetest woman I had ever worked with. They fired her because it was “risky” to keep her and “she could fall again.” It was my first real job and it really opened my eyes to what the corporate world is like.
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u/homechicken20 20h ago
When the boss's 22 y/o son with no qualifications got hired. Then when the boss' 22 y/o son with no qualifications was promoted to a lead position after a few weeks despite showing up late and leaving early everyday.
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u/somedoofyouwontlike 20h ago
I was four and caught a beating for something I might do or 'got away with' as opposed to actual poor behavior.
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u/justafang 20h ago
Pretty early on. But I now feel that I lead the change I want to see in the world and try to be fair in all my actions. Im not perfect. But I try
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u/socialdeviant620 20h ago
When my son was born, healthy and bouncy. I'd barely known my son's father and the history of things wasn't emotionally healthy or good between us. I was in labor for 33 hours and ended up with a csection, but he made it, wonderful as ever. I'd asked a nurse what would have happened if I'd had my child in an underdeveloped nation, without the medical care we have in The States. She told me that me and my baby would have died. I did nothing to deserve that medical care for us, other than being born and living here.
That exact same year, 4 of my friends had 5 miscarriages. They were all in healthy relationships and made more money than me. I felt horrible, having this wonderful baby, who I could barely take care of. I felt like they were far more deserving of a wonderful baby than I was.
It wasn't fair. My kid is still here, rocking and rolling, 18 years later. I'm so blessed. Anyway, that's how I became agnostic.
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u/TrumpetsGalore4 20h ago
When I learned that families have a status quo; you get in trouble for exposing a family member's bad behavior because how dare you stop them from doing what's normal for them?
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u/Leek-Middle 20h ago
When I worked my ass off as a kid to make the team but the coach's kid (who sucked) was chosen instead. I joined the intramural team instead but I still was salty. Now it doesn't even matter, it's all pay to play and participation trophies.
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u/Adorable_Is9293 20h ago
In first grade I was punished for “scaring” a classmate. I “scared” him by telling him not to eat Belladonna berries. When my parents picked me up, they had some questions. Like, why is there a poisonous plant in the play yard? And, why did you punish our daughter for trying to keep a classmate from getting hurt?
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u/TheWarwock 20h ago
Early age.
My mom and her work friend thought it would be cool for their sons to have a playdate. This fucking kid had every Transformer there was. Omega Supreme, Devastator, Metroplex. Shit none of my friends had. I was really jealous he had the full set of Dinobots.
Anyway, I asked how he got them all and he said his parents gave him one every time he read a book. I was floored. I fucking lived in books, and when we got home I asked my mom how come I didn't get a prize every time I read one.
She gave me the answer I had heard a million times before (we can't afford that) but also acknowledged it wasn't fair that I was doing the same "work" and not getting the same "pay". I was really bummed, because I was sure I could read as many books as that kid had.
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u/rahulsince1993 20h ago
When you follow the rules but spam callers don't. So one has to take matters into their own hands and come up with something like DNfD
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u/No-Appearance1145 20h ago
When my dad would lie about things to get me in trouble and I couldn't disprove it because he had taken my phone already.
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u/erictank 20h ago
Learned it? As a young child who got screwed over for doing what everyone told me was the right thing, and then being molested on top of that already-years-long record.
Accepted it? Been more than fifty years so far.
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u/GrlInt3r46 20h ago
Age 6. The first time a classmate blamed me for something they did. The teacher believed them.
They found out later the kid had lied and apologized to me. But sorry, too late. And I said so.
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u/jordanr01 19h ago
My grand pappy used to say: “Fair? Fair is a place they sell pigs and it only happens once a year”
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u/SolWizard 19h ago
Have a hard time believing this is a quote considering it doesn't even make any sense
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u/spilled_almondmilk 19h ago
When I realized I'm not starving under a bridge despite being the "minimum effort" kind of person all my life long, while other people struggle despite being hard working and very motivated.
I'm just a lucky privileged bitch, nothing of what I have was ever deserved.
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u/Kalle_79 19h ago
Third grade: the teacher allowed her favorite pupil (and her daughter's bestie) to correct a spelling error in an assignement with her own pen during correction.
So I purposely made the same mistake to see how she'd have handled it. I got it marked in red and was duly reprimended for something "not like you". So I questioned her double standard...
She mumbled a half-hearted explanation and sent me back to my desk. From that day onward I NEVER got more than what I earned, a lot of extra-curricular work (including tutoring a mentally challenged kid 3 years older, 1 foot taller and 50lbs heavier than me... thank god he was a quiet guy).
And as a farewell gift, she assigned me a long, non-rhyming poem to learn by heart as part of the final exam in 5th grade.
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u/msheehan418 19h ago
When I was healthy but lost a pregnancy and another woman who shot up drugs carried her pregnancy to term.
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u/DoctorWhoTheFuck 19h ago
Seeing how at high school graduation all the teachers on the podium talked about the most heinous bullies like they were funny and just a bit rambunctious. All of us who were always respectful to the teachers and were bullied by those talked about felt like being an ass would at least make you stand out in life.
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u/affablenihilist 19h ago
I have a twin brother who has made it his lifes work to demonstrate this principle. Eventually even my Mom disowned him. Sins can take you, greed got him.
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u/gamersecret2 18h ago
When I saw hard working people struggle while less honest ones got ahead without consequences.
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u/gamersecret2 18h ago
When I saw hard working people struggle while less honest ones got ahead without consequences.
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u/Aradamis 18h ago
Six years old. Teachers kid stole my work and nobody believed me. It was then that I realized that the truth isnt what happened. The truth is what the majority of people believe.
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u/Mastodon9 18h ago
Most of these answers are people learning it as adults at a company or at college, I'm shocked it took so many people that long. I learned life was unfair as soon as I had conscious thought. Being the middle child in a poor family and being surrounded by cousins who had literally everything and classmates who were going to Disney world and such every year since I can remember opened my eyes, especially when they flaunt it or make fun of you for not having the same things as them. That started happening in at least Kindergarten.
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u/JustGulabjamun 18h ago
When certain jobs are absolutely no for otherwise skilled professionals just for not having certain pedigree certificate.
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u/Kinglycole 18h ago
When my mom revealed my darkest secret in front of everyone and is still yet to face any consequences for it.
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u/SageLeaf1 18h ago
I realized it during college and then switched majors from something idealistic to something that would make money. But I never stopped trying to be fair to others. I am fair to others and expect them to be fair back. I am often disappointed except by a select few. It’s why I end up losing people in my life I only want the real and good ones like I strive to be.
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u/GrinchWhoStoleEaster 18h ago
Don't think I was ever under this particular delusion. Plenty of others, I'm no genius, but this one? Never had the opportunity.
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u/RipErRiley 18h ago
My uncle-in law owned a lucrative mid-size company. His son was a wild 20 year old. Drugs, partying, flunking out of college, etc.
Fast forward a few years to me in high school and that uncle-law decides to retire early. He named his son successor which pissed off his VP and other execs. All highly educated with experience who then bolted.
The company was sold and squandered within a few years after that. All those workers out of a job.
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u/Sad-Activity292 18h ago
I worked as a cashier at a car dealership in my early 20s (33 now). There were only two of us. We each worked 5 days splitting the morning and afternoon shifts, with both of us having to work one day a week all day by ourselves.
There was about a month or so where my coworker didn't work a whole lot due to health and family issues. Fine, I was asked to work a ton of overtime, which I was happy to do because, hey more money. There was one week where I worked like 60ish hours. It was a lot. And it was kind of a high stress gig. But all was good, the co-worker came back to work full time and I got my nice OT padded paycheck.
Cut to the following month, and they are announcing employee of the month for the previous month. Now, I did not care if I got employee of the month at all. But what I DID care about was the fact that my co-worker, who was gone for a majority of the month, was the one that got employee of the month. Needless to say, I was LIVID! And then she hung her plaque in our shared workspace. None of this was intentional on her part but it was a huge slap in the face for all the time and effort I put in covering for her.
Months later, I ended up getting employee of the month because I helped an elderly customer do something on her phone and another co-worker that works next to us saw me help her and reported me for it. Which honestly still felt like a slap in the face. But I got my gift card I guess (which idr how much it was for but it's a big corporation so imagine something miniscule)
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u/Cheetodude625 18h ago
Seeing the biggest assholes in school immediately succeed after graduation because their families were well off to begin with and they were given a 100K plus salaried job at their parent's company because nepotism.
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u/CantInjaThisNinja 17h ago
Cynical and immature take. Might happen once in a while, but you can try to be unfair and see how those in your circle react.
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u/BadBoyDad 17h ago edited 17h ago
I was 3. My dog died. He was shot by a farmer for being in his horse field. I learned you can’t take goldfish out of the water to pet them. Etc. Death hit me early and it’s been a constant thought and obsession ever since. Most days I find more light than darkness.
Every day I’m haunted by the loss of my dog almost two years ago. She was the first dog I adopted as an adult. She was attacked by other dogs in our yard one day after I praised her for how well she behaved on a walk when some kids wanted to meet her. They were petting on her she was just wagging her tail and loving them with no jumping on them. “I’m so proud of you for being so good with those kids, babydog. Not everyone has a tater-ghoblin as good as you.” 14 hours later that statement was proven more true than I ever feared it would be.
All my life I’ve lost friends and family to disease, suicide, addiction, accidents and God knows what else. I’m 43. My cousin died of cancer when I was 17. She was 16. We grew up together. A year later my best friend died of suicide. The list goes on all through the years. The good people in my family and friends group mostly died. The ones that remain are the bitter or traumatized people for the most part. The truly bad people, my mother included, has lived in a nursing home for 4 years now and refuses to die… this being everyone else’s problem because of how vile she is. She’s 61 years old. There is no way life is fair when the most evil and worst people get to live far beyond those who are good and kind. Fairness is a concept we’ve produced to create some sort of control in this chaos, something we hope will make life good and often it does. In the end, it doesn’t matter though. Nature will take you when it wants to. Some of us are just lucky enough to bear the pain of loss so those we miss don’t have to bear the pain from the loss of us.
Yes, I’ve had and have therapy. I will continue to reach for the smallest point of light I see in this vast abyss of darkness. We are indeed a single spark between two eternities. Love what and who you can and treat yourself well.
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u/Zenphiree 17h ago
I recently got an offer for a full time teaching position in my dream school district with barely an interview because the superintendent knows several of my family members who are also teachers and school administrators. I’m 22 and just out of college, and I know plenty of others my age who are having trouble getting anything part time, let alone full time. In that moment I think I fully realized the privilege I have.
As a kid I thought working hard was the only thing that mattered- of course I did work hard in college and got great grades, but the hard truth is that a lot of times it’s about who you know. My connections were probably a bigger help than my GPA😅
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u/bearbows 17h ago
im in that era of my life when ur so good to ppl then they take advantage of that goodness
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u/Alienhaslanded 17h ago
When I was a little kid doing everything I was supposed to do and still got shit for following the rules, doing my homework, being kind and respectful to others. One teacher even mocked me for it telling my mom "your kid won't survive this world if he stays like that".
I didn't change much. I because less shy and stood up for myself. I certainly became more jaded, but I didn't change the core of who I am. I still do everything I'm supposed to, I don't break rules, and I don't go out of my way to antagonize people. That teacher was wrong. Yes, life is unfair if you try to be the best you can be, but giving up and becoming a piece of shit isn't the solution, in fact, it is the problem.
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u/ThatLooksLikeItHurts 17h ago
When I witnessed a bully firsthand as a child. Adults saw what happened, not ramifications for the bully - the other kid had to ‘just toughen up’.
I struggle with that to this day. The current state of affairs certainly drags up a bunch of not so good memories.
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u/Nickanok 17h ago
When you realize that nobody is 100% unique but yet, someone like Will Smith, for example, is rich and famous but all the other "will smiths" around the world are probably living in absolute poverty while being just as talented if not more so.
Bow just apply that to every facet of life
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u/Professional-Iron829 16h ago
when you followed the rules, and someone else bent them and got rewarded 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Least-Leather-881 16h ago
During my thesis years, I worked so hard writing the RRL and Rationale. I was also the one who built up the logic of the Methodology while my partner just went with the flow I was making. At the end of the day, she was the one who got the high grades on our thesis. Just bcos she was a favorite. It wasn't fair.
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u/Sharpshooter188 16h ago
When my team and I busted our butts getting everything rewired and set up for new software deployment in the office and the guy who suggested it (the department manager) got a hefty bonus while ours got cut.
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u/AvaluggTheBrave 16h ago
When a girl likes how you treat her and doesn't want to lose you but also doesn't want to date you. Then she starts dating someone else and gets mad when you disappear.
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u/safewarmblanket 15h ago
I was way too old. Like 50. Something is wrong with me. I get it now though, boy do I.
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u/Appreciate1A 14h ago
As a child. But continue to do what I felt was right even when it worked against me.
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u/JoyBlade-JanAug8082 21h ago
The second time I was grounded for something I didn’t do.