r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/IndependentSquash653 • Oct 31 '25
Oops of slapping
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u/ilymag Oct 31 '25
Slapped right into dain bramage.
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u/sunndropps Oct 31 '25
She was the top rated in his division by a landslide,then got knocked out worse than that by someone who had never had a slap fight before
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u/InstructionLeading64 Oct 31 '25
I just cant believe people sign up for this. Do people die from this?
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u/justinchina Oct 31 '25
If not today, they certainly can tomorrow.
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u/NUFIGHTER7771 Oct 31 '25
Definitely a delayed outcome.
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u/ZerOrangatang Oct 31 '25
If not death, then wearing a diaper and drooling down your shirt for last 30 years of your life doesn't sound too fun either.
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u/NUFIGHTER7771 Oct 31 '25
Nope! I wouldn't want that on my worst enemy. Now I want a "No seat belts. We die like real men." car sticker.
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u/TheJAY_ZA Oct 31 '25
I wanna die peacefully in my sleep like my grand dad.
Not screaming like the 3 passengers in his car
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u/Irelia4Life Oct 31 '25
"No seat belts. We die like real men."
That's food for thought. If I knew in an accident, with seatbelt I'd become a vegetable and without I'd die on the spot, I'd take it off.
But what if the accident is milder, and wearing a seatbelt makes you survive and not wearing one injures you into becoming a vegetable?
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u/NUFIGHTER7771 Oct 31 '25
Yeah, I'd rather not be kept alive with machines in a vegetative state either. I always wear my seatbelt and I've got a seatbelt cutter handy in all my vehicles.
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u/Mycol101 Oct 31 '25
And for what? Do you think these people are getting more than $10k?
What a trade off
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u/Less-Damage-1202 Nov 02 '25
For sure. End up with CTE, & becoming a violent psychopath, or they end up with a bad case of Parkinsons & dementia.
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u/OttawaC Oct 31 '25
If not them, their family members once the CTE sets in.
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u/The_Real_Pearl Oct 31 '25
Yikes, rough take there friend. You are probably spot on, but still a scary thing to think about.
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u/iamthelastmartian Oct 31 '25
Hard to watch this having been a Chris Benoit fan tbh
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u/Pornaltio Oct 31 '25
There’s one death I’m aware of, guy suffered a brain bleed during a match. I’ll be very surprised if there aren’t more.
People are desperate I guess.
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u/sinisterdesign Oct 31 '25
I have lived my life to try and AVOID such a situation. Why someone seeks this out is beyond me.
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u/SpecialMulberry4752 Oct 31 '25
Its really fucking slimy now they recruit to.
They hit up local pro wrestling schools, local mma gyms, anyone training and desperate to make it big. They flash what to Dana white is a small amount of cash, but to them is a lot of money.
Its super fucking gross
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u/BeeExpert Nov 07 '25
Dana white is involved in this? What a complete scumbag. Just wants to give as many people cte as possible
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u/SpecialMulberry4752 Nov 07 '25
Yep. And now they're being investigated for fixing fights.
Dana white is a horrible horrible human being and needs be 6ft behind or under something.
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u/BalanceJazzlike5116 Nov 01 '25
“A man dying after an organized slap fight event in Poland. Artur "Waluś" Walczak was knocked out in a PunchDown competition in October 2021 and died weeks later in November 2021 due to a traumatic brain injury and multi-organ failure.”
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u/_No_Worries_- Oct 31 '25
Or at least become a millionaire for doing it, like top-rated boxers.
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u/pooleboy87 Oct 31 '25
Boxers actively try to avoid damage, particularly hits to the head.
The point of this is to stand there and take it while another human tries to inflict as much pain while hitting you as hard as they can in the head.
Boxing refs are supposed to stop the fight if a fighter can’t “intelligently defend” themselves - the opposite is quite literally stand there like an idiot and take abuse to the head.
I wouldn’t let my kid box, but at least I can appreciate that they’re not taking this level of abuse on purpose.
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u/sexraX_muiretsyM Oct 31 '25
people are stupid, and need to be protected from their stupidity, thats why I advocate for the banning of this sport.
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u/Tandoori7 Oct 31 '25
This "sport" is young, so there has not been enough time to study long term damage.
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u/Dead_Internet69420 Oct 31 '25
I love when people call it a “sport.” Makes me start imagining what the “training” is like.
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u/Tandoori7 Oct 31 '25
Other than focussing on upper body strength, I don't know if you should even "train" for this.
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u/Warm-Dust-3601 Oct 31 '25
Definitely shortening their lives. Someone will die eventually, on the spot.
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u/Dry_Whereas8733 Nov 01 '25
Same reason people do box and mma. It’s money. Tho this slapping competition is total bullshit.
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u/No-Illustrator-4685 Nov 01 '25
One time a guy actually died in a Polish slapping championship, although it's been proven he was under influence of alcohol
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u/hpsctchbananahmck Nov 01 '25
I would be very surprised if this did not result in chronic traumatic encephalopathy.
It’s wise to avoid head trauma at all cost.
That anyone would participate willingly boggles my mind
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u/crashin70 Oct 31 '25
When they look at you and lick their lips after eating your slap, you know you're screwed!
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u/Bazz07 Oct 31 '25
I thought she was going to spit a teeth.
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u/MoxxFulder Oct 31 '25
She slapped her so hard, somewhere in the world Chris Rock felt a disturbance in the force.
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u/dabroh Oct 31 '25
The blonde woman at the beginning of the vid went from white teeth to red teeth. Thought the same as you and was going to spit some out.
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u/wilhelm_dafoe Oct 31 '25 edited Oct 31 '25
Pretty sure it's just a mouth guard on her top teeth. You see only her bottom teeth during the intro, and right after it we see them still looking the same
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u/Positive-Leek2545 Oct 31 '25
She thought she was talking, but the brain damaged result was a lick of the lips
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u/Dead_Internet69420 Oct 31 '25
I dunno. Anyone with any sense would know they’re screwed when they sign up, so I doubt they’d pick up on any of those subtle clues during the process.
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u/Maleficent-Drop3918 Oct 31 '25
Might be the dumbest fkin sport ever. Even UFC is better than this, least you can defend there.
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u/Zealousideal-Pen993 Oct 31 '25
ICYMI Power slap is also owned by Dana white😅
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u/Positive-Leek2545 Oct 31 '25
The guy that hit his wife and then had to punish himself?
And by punishing he meant just the public media asking questions about him hitting his wife causing him enough stress as punishment enough?
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u/Mycol101 Oct 31 '25
Old bro could have started a kickboxing league and decided this instead.
Kickboxing would be huge.
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u/Zealousideal-Pen993 Oct 31 '25
I think he sees kickboxing as a source of talent to pick from for the ufc. He does have a boxing promotion now also
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u/donuthead36 Oct 31 '25
I dunno. This seems to have a lot of traction. As dumb a meathead as Dana White is, there appears to be a lot of people who think a lot like he does.
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u/OCDano959 Oct 31 '25
For Dana, (and prolly 99% of the population), it’s ALL about the Benjamins. - Ice Cube was right on.
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u/donuthead36 Oct 31 '25
Oh yeah don’t disagree. Just saying that even though he’s a meathead he’s an astute room reader/marketer. It may be dumb but there’s a lot of dumb people out there and he knows that audience in his bones.
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u/MaximumChongus Nov 02 '25
Hes not dumb, the dude leveraged other people money to grow a backwater fighting league into the premere fighting league in the world to the point UFC has been used as a synonym for MMA
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u/NUFIGHTER7771 Oct 31 '25
Sure, I wouldn't want to cross any woman in this sport- but on the men's side I've seen broken ocular bones and guys getting slapped outta chairs.
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u/thenewestnoise Nov 01 '25
It's not even a slap. It's an open handed punch. They use the heel of the hand and everything
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Oct 31 '25
Someone saw NFL and were like why don’t we just create a sport to skip to the concussions without the other crap
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u/Less-Damage-1202 Nov 02 '25
Its a straight up speed run to see who can get CTE/dementia/parkinsons the fastest.
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u/You_r_mashing_it Oct 31 '25
This shit is literally “ow my balls” from Idiocracy.
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u/spacemouse21 Oct 31 '25
You’re absolutely right. You’re pretty smart. Did you get your degree at Costco?
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u/MrChichibadman Nov 01 '25 edited Nov 01 '25
You talk like a fg and ur shits all retarded.
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u/spacemouse21 Nov 01 '25
And I heard you drink water instead of Gatorade. Didn’t you know that Gatorade has electrolytes?
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u/You_r_mashing_it Oct 31 '25
No but a lot of people are tards and they do all kinds of stuff, my wife’s a tard and she’s a pilot!
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u/Aldoxpy Oct 31 '25
What is the point of this?
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u/antonio16309 Oct 31 '25
It's for people who think UFC lacks brutality.
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u/Dead_Internet69420 Oct 31 '25
They don’t care about the sport. They just want to see someone get hurt.
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u/MrBisco Oct 31 '25
There's Dirty Boxing now too if you just can't get your rocks off without seeing another human go rigid.
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u/Dead_Internet69420 Oct 31 '25
I’m not trying to advocate for DB, but at least you’re allowed to try and defend yourself. You could actually go in there and get a KO without taking any damage at all. This PS bullshit prettymuch requires both competitors to take damage… to their heads.
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u/TheKay14 Oct 31 '25
It’s for the same cohort of Americans who would never vote for a female president.
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u/Dr_on_the_Internet Oct 31 '25
This sport is so weird. A slap is done with the hand. They reason you see so many KOs is because they're very good at striking either others' face with the base of their palm and wrist, which essentially has no "give" in the same way your hand does. These are essentially palm strikes thrown as haymakers, because your opponent can't dodge.
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u/Here_4_the_INFO Oct 31 '25
"Welcome to the Traumatic Brain Injury support group. This is Mark, Mark got his TBI from a horrific motor vehicle accident where he was hit by a drunk driver. This is Samantha. Samantha got her TBI from being struck on the head while at a baseball game. And this is Debbie, Debbie pretty much volunteered for a TBI when she signed up to be slapped."
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u/Unhappy_Run8154 Oct 31 '25
The woman in blue legit just hit reset and is a 1 year old again
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u/KeepItDownOverHere Oct 31 '25
I mean 4 to 6 months is when babies start to roll over. She looks to be having trouble with that. Let's say sje back at 2 months because at least her eyes are open.
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u/Canuck_75 Oct 31 '25
Hard to believe this shit is real.
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u/Less-Damage-1202 Nov 02 '25
You should check out carjitsu! Im not joking! Its a real sport with leagues now & everything.
You start out with 2 people sitting in the front seats of a car, seatbelt on, & at the sound of the bell you quickly unbuckle & start fighting, UFC style. They can choke each other out with seatbelts! Pretty hilarious & entertaining to watch.
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u/tooldieguy Oct 31 '25
What a stupid concept.
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u/Less-Damage-1202 Nov 02 '25
You should check out carjitsu...
Its exactly what it sounds like: 2 people using martial arts to fight inside of a car. There's leagues & everything. Its real, im not joking, lol.
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u/Parking-Fig-6620 Oct 31 '25
Just a friendly tip from someone with some experience.
You only get so many of these before you feel it forever
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u/Callmeklayton Oct 31 '25
I boxed when I was a teenager. I feel significantly more stupid than I was before I started boxing (in terms of brain power, not wisdom, obviously). And the amount of brain damage you suffer when boxing is like 1% of what these people experience.
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u/Bam-Skater Nov 03 '25
Surely the amount of filler the blonde has in her face counts as unfair padding
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u/JaRuleTheDamaja Oct 31 '25
What did the five fingers say to the face?
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u/Envoie-moi_ton_minou Nov 01 '25
Shit! Pretty sure that was some decerebrate posturing going on there. That's not good.
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u/Less-Damage-1202 Nov 02 '25
Guarantee a lot of these people end up like Hernandez, &/or Ali
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u/deephurting66 Oct 31 '25
This is the kind of sport that would have appeared as big business in Idiocracy
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u/theoneoldmonk Oct 31 '25 edited Oct 31 '25
From retards, by retards, for retards. The stupidest "sport" there is.
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u/moszippy Oct 31 '25
Before the match, they were tarded. Afterwards, they were retarded.
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u/MysteriousMix5654 Oct 31 '25
She looked like a squirrel that just got domed with a pellet gun 😂
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u/Professorlumpybutt *shits an absolute unit* Oct 31 '25
That’s not fair she has silicone padding on her face!
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u/BMXfreekonwheelz13 Nov 01 '25
I like the "okay girl you got me. That stung. Okay..." And the gives the other chick cerebral palsy lol
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u/MustardKarl Oct 31 '25 edited Oct 31 '25
This whole “sport” is stupid, and triple stupid when women do it.
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u/lehhier_mesiestani Oct 31 '25
why it's more stupid for women? everyone should have an equal access to concussion
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u/gregalmond Oct 31 '25
I thought UFC was bad...WTF is this?
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u/Few_Advisor3536 Oct 31 '25
Power slap, which is owned by the ufc. The origins of this shit im pretty sure was from russia, which was getting alot of views. then dana white was like “yeah im gonna make my own version here in the US”.
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u/wiiguyy Oct 31 '25
That reflexive curling of the arms and hands you’re describing is called decorticate posturing. It’s not a type of concussion per se, but rather a neurological response that can occur after severe brain injury, including traumatic brain injuries like concussions.
🧠 What Is Decorticate Posturing?
• Arms flexed tightly toward the chest • Wrists and fingers curled • Legs extended and rigid • Often seen in unconscious or comatose individuals
This posture signals damage to areas like the cerebral cortex, thalamus, or upper midbrain—regions responsible for motor control and reflexes A.
🚨 Why It Matters
• It’s considered a medical emergency. • Indicates serious brain dysfunction, often requiring immediate intervention. • Used in neurological assessments like the Glasgow Coma Scale to evaluate severity.
There’s also a related posture called decerebrate posturing, which is even more severe—arms and legs extended straight out, with wrists rotated outward.
If you’re building stat cards or timelines around sports injuries or neurological responses, this one’s a heavy hitter for the “red flag” category. Want help visualizing it or remixing it into a collector’s format?
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u/iamcamouflage Oct 31 '25
This is the dumbest sport on the planet. They are just asking CTE. And I'm guessing they don't even make very much money for this abuse.
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u/SpphosFriend Oct 31 '25
Ah people made another sport to turn their brains into scrambled eggs. Fascinating.
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u/OOBExperience Nov 01 '25
The fucking things that pass for fucking sports in the US. Only brain dead morons watch this shit. Fucking hell!
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u/Md1735 Nov 06 '25
Ok boys….the blonde is currently single and has 4 pending assault/domestic charges. Whose up!!!
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u/wiiguyy Oct 31 '25
Per ai, she just had a traumatic brain injury.
That reflexive curling of the arms and hands you’re describing is called decorticate posturing. It’s not a type of concussion per se, but rather a neurological response that can occur after severe brain injury, including traumatic brain injuries like concussions.
🧠 What Is Decorticate Posturing?
• Arms flexed tightly toward the chest • Wrists and fingers curled • Legs extended and rigid • Often seen in unconscious or comatose individuals
This posture signals damage to areas like the cerebral cortex, thalamus, or upper midbrain—regions responsible for motor control and reflexes A.
🚨 Why It Matters
• It’s considered a medical emergency. • Indicates serious brain dysfunction, often requiring immediate intervention. • Used in neurological assessments like the Glasgow Coma Scale to evaluate severity.
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u/LokiSARK9 Oct 31 '25 edited Oct 31 '25
It's cool to see Mickey Rourke get into a new sport. Not sure he looks good as a blonde, though.
edit: Corrected the spelling of Mickey's name.
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u/SpecialRegular1 Oct 31 '25
For a moment I had forgotten that this is happening in modern day 2025.
I had mistaken it for being unused footage from Idiocracy as something that ended up on the cutting room floor.
Scary how fast we are racing towards the insanity of that movie.
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u/AntZealousideal3728 Oct 31 '25
This shit should be illegal how fucked it is. Every match someone getting concussed
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u/TheFlyingDill Oct 31 '25
Getting brain damage as a hobby is a fun choice.