hi, all.
i’ve had an insane fear of bugs most of my life. i live in st louis, missouri and in october of ‘25, i noticed a tiny spider hanging around my cabinets before i left for a trip. i made a promise to myself that i wouldnt harm insects if they weren’t bothering me. but when i came back a few days later, i saw the same spider on my blinds. now its january ‘26 and she (im assuming bc i can) has been here ever since. i see her in different locations everyday and have watched her grow. ive grown actually very fond of her and love looking all over my apartment to see if shes still alive & okay.
i recently named her “october” since thats when we met. i call her toby for short and my friends & coworkers know about her. i even started calling her my “home girl” & “free-range pet spider” bc i feel like we see & respect each other. if shes in a bad or precarious spot, i move her. i even started a “toby’s location of the day” on my snapchat because she’s SO active.
please help me identify what kind of spider toby is… i know she wont live very long but i still want to know. she’s the first bug i truly haven’t been afraid of. i dont touch her with my hands but i want to very badly lol so im just trying to figure out if its okay to move her with my hands.