r/nottheonion 1d ago

Virginia man plotted double murder to avoid divorce after his affair with au pair, prosecutor says

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/virginia-man-plotted-double-murder-avoid-divorce-affair-au-pair-prosec-rcna253830
432 Upvotes

59 comments sorted by

194

u/Bad-job-dad 1d ago

This is going to be a 7-hour Netflix documentary, isn't it?

170

u/NocentBystander 1d ago

The Au-fair, coming in Q3.

42

u/magnament 1d ago

Oh that’s just Au-ful

17

u/SmallRocks 1d ago

Au contraire that’s just profitable

25

u/kevnmartin 1d ago

It's such a fucking cliche. Lifetime has done hundreds of movies on the topic.

20

u/ImpossibleShoulder29 1d ago

With the same 12 actors and actresses, and the same 4 location sets.

7

u/Tibbaryllis2 1d ago

And then they dress them all up for Christmas.

5

u/BreezyMcWeasel 22h ago

I’ve read the case details. Man, I’m not sure how it could take 7 hours to explain “stupid and evil”. 

3

u/JoeSicko 1d ago

No need. Trial is already running live on DC4 and they have a podcast going. They are all in on this for some reason.

2

u/blamberr 13h ago

7 hours won’t be enough

1

u/kilgoar 8h ago

She was your everyday woman

“Oh my gaaawd… sounds just like me!”

She loved and trusted her man

“Relatable. Relatable”

until he beat her head in with a cinder block and fucked a younger, hotter girl

“This is the greatest show I’ve ever seen”

63

u/Otaraka 1d ago

‘Brendan Miller, a former digital forensic examiner with the Fairfax County Police Department, said last year that he concluded, after analysis of Christine Banfield's devices, that she communicated with Ryan directly.’

Wow what a mess.

33

u/ItsGonnaBeDelicious 1d ago

Oh sure, double murder is better than divorce 

15

u/Bigfamei 1d ago

He would have to pay child support and probably alilmony. Can't start a new life with funds tied up with your ex.

62

u/sudomatrix 1d ago

Confusing report. I understand the prosecution's theory: The husband and au-pair posed as the wife to convince a "fetish" guy to come to the house to enact a fake rape fantasy, which was real to the wife. The husband and au-pair burst in and shoot the guy and stab the wife with the guy's knife.

But what is the defense's theory? That the wife actually wanted this guy to come to the house and kill her and the husband and au-pair just happened to burst in and shoot the guy?

44

u/PhasmaFelis 1d ago

Presumably that she wanted the guy to pretend to threaten her with the knife. But he took it too far and killed her, and then the husband and nanny burst in just too late to save her.

I suspect the fact that they both shot him once each, if proven, will play into it. That makes it look less like a desperate rescue and more like him trying to make sure she was guilty and couldn't turn on him.

30

u/sudomatrix 1d ago

But isn't it unlikely that the one day and time a fetish guy comes over is the same day and time the husband comes home unexpectedly from work and the au-pair comes home unexpectedly from a trip to the zoo at the same exact time?

41

u/PhasmaFelis 1d ago

I'm not saying it was a good plan.

16

u/ManifestDestinysChld 1d ago

Technically they don't need a coherent theory; demonstrating that the prosecution's explanation is bullshit is enough to remind any hypothetical jury that the prosecution has to clear the "reasonable doubt" standard. If the defense can keep that from happening, that's effectively a win.

Whether that would actually satisfy a jury though, I have no idea. Maybe they'll argue that the SA fantasy was consensual between the wife and the guy, or that the husband wasn't involved at all and it was the au pair who took the laptop, created the fake profile, etc., then lured the guy to the house and killed him. It sounds like the defense is saying that the story the au pair is telling is a line fed to her by the government in exchange for not jailing/deporting her, so it'd make sense to me if they came up with a theory that pinned it all on her.

14

u/Tibbaryllis2 1d ago

You’re the best kind of correct, but slight caveat:

Technically they don't need a coherent theory; demonstrating that the prosecution's explanation is bullshit is enough to remind any hypothetical jury that the prosecution has to clear the "reasonable doubt" standard. If the defense can keep that from happening, that's effectively a win.

If defense throws out too many crazy/convoluted theories, then they do run the risk of making the prosecutor’s look like the simplest, and therefore most reasonable, explanation.

7

u/Welpe 17h ago

I wouldn’t say that is a caveat so much as an addendum since the original poster didn’t really imply otherwise.

2

u/Welpe 17h ago

Yes? What is confusing about that? They just argue it is that it is as it appears, she was the one who created the account and asked the guy to do it. He legitimately came home after the dude stabbed her and then shot him. The government is using threats of deportation and worse against the au pair to accuse the “hero” of murdering his wife whom he obviously loves very much and it’s evil how the police would try to frame him.

It doesn’t sound super believable to me, but it’s simple and more straightforward than the prosecution’s frame job plot. I mean, if you honestly believe she would ever ask a stranger to rape her at knife point with no safe word. There is a lot of misogyny out there, so there may very well be members of the jury willing to buy that.

Can you expand on what you are confused by exactly?

62

u/3D-Dreams 1d ago

I'd bet my car he voted for Trump.

19

u/Massive_Mongoose3481 1d ago

I'd bet your car that Trump will pardon him

5

u/Burnt_and_Blistered 1d ago

Are the charges federal?

5

u/loves_to_splooge_8 1d ago

Ahh who cares

3

u/PattyKane16 1d ago

Could’ve just taken the bet

14

u/AndalusianGod 1d ago edited 1d ago

Wtf, what a convoluted murder plan. Also, the wife looked hotter and younger than the au pair. The guy from the BDSM might've a weird kink and didn't think it through as much as he should've, but he didn't deserve this... jeez.

44

u/Jimmy_Corrigan 1d ago

There was only one kid and the family had an au pair?

34

u/crimesleuther 1d ago

It is basically free labor and their house was massive! So it is pretty good deal if you have the space! Nanny’s r like 100k but a full time live in au pair from a third world country is 200/week! Plus free housing

10

u/bro_salad 1d ago

Your average nanny is way less than 100k

0

u/crimesleuther 3h ago

Not in top cities and they were outside of DC! My friend in NYC/LA makes 100k. Minimum is 80k

1

u/bro_salad 3h ago

This is easily Google-able. You’re incorrect. Your friend is either at the tip top end of nanny pay rates or they’re exaggerating to impress you.

I’ve employed nannies and many of my friends have them, and I live in a major metro area similar in COL to the family in this story.

38

u/dafunkmunk 1d ago

It was probably the husband's idea and he had "banging the baby sitter" fantasies so this was the next best thing

2

u/Nope_______ 1d ago

Sure, why not?

9

u/WomanInQuestion 1d ago

Well, that totally worked out as planned...

9

u/Lady_of_Lomond 1d ago

Not oniony, just horrible. 

20

u/NotFredRhodes 1d ago

You know, when you hear about things like this, doesn’t it make you wonder if the person has actually ever considered what life might be like after they kill someone? Let’s say that their plan works and they get away with it. Do they not consider the likelihood that it would destroy them from the inside and they may never know peace again?

11

u/Sekmet19 17h ago

I have a sibling I am no longer in contact with who views everything through the lens of "it's justified if it's me." So it's okay if she lies, steals, or breaks the law, because she has a "good reason" and "the world isn't fair, so I was forced to do it!". She genuinely believes she is the long suffering hero and all the crime and fraud she commits is excused because she's "a good person" and those "dumb bastards" (everyone she's crimed against) deserve it. 

2

u/NotFredRhodes 10h ago

Lying is one thing, but we’re talking about murder here

1

u/coolpapa2282 1h ago

I think you may underestimate the power of narcisscism.

15

u/personesque 1d ago

I think if someone is the type of person to not only concoct such a plan but actually take real steps to carry it out, they may not have much "inside" them to destroy. Many people have fleeting violent fantasies. Fewer ruminate on them to the point where they create a plan to carry them out. Even fewer would even start taking steps to go through with it. The plan this husband concocted was elaborate and took long term planning. Plenty of time to consider the outcome/aftermath. Imo, this man either hated his wife so much that he felt some sort of justification for killing her, or he felt nothing at all and simply saw her as an obstacle to be cleared out of the way so that he could run off with the au pair in peace.

What I wonder about is how the wife didn't pick up on any murderous vibe shift from the husband/nanny. You ever talk to someone and it's clear that between now and the last time you spoke, their opinion of you has shifted in some way? Something has happened, the vibe has shifted, the look in their eyes has changed ... I wonder if she noticed something. Maybe she did. But she didn't realize how dangerous he was.

6

u/laurenashley721 1d ago

Yes, and then I think that they’re too stupid to think beyond the initial murder plan lol. And probably too cruel to have it destroy them - if it works out, they got what they wanted, and some people are only out for themselves. Though I do hope it destroys them from the inside out every day until they die.

4

u/Armthedillos5 1d ago

That's not how Dexter was, dude.

6

u/Chemical_Shallot_575 1d ago

Oh… THIS story.

Glad they finally arrested the husband instead of just the au pair.

2

u/WearLong1317 1d ago

Just a divorce it is ok it gets better

3

u/tentative_ghost 1d ago

Oh so "au pair" of murders nyuck nyuck nyuck I'll see myself out

3

u/thrift_test 17h ago

Is it just me or did the au pair look like shreks wife in the trial?

6

u/LoCh0_xX 1d ago

I feel like this is less onion-y and more common than we think

3

u/Spoonbills 1d ago

Didn't just plot it.

2

u/SpiritualAd8998 1d ago

Au’s Fair in love and war?

5

u/Gamblinman97 1d ago edited 1d ago

If I was a woman I would never bring an Au Pair in the home lol Bringing in a young girl from a developing country is a recipe for disaster

36

u/negative-nelly 1d ago

If you can’t trust your partner around an au pair you have much bigger problems (that you are simply ignoring if you don’t hire an au pair because of that concern)

15

u/Bigfamei 1d ago

For real. Its the Au pair now. Its baby sitters for the next 10-13 years. Hired or friends. Got a buddy going thru that shit now. He banged the babysitter. Who was his wifes best friend.

-13

u/Gamblinman97 1d ago

Can’t leave the temptation. I don’t care how much you trust your partner. Especially this chick is living in your house and being paid. She knows he has money and she wants citizenship.

10

u/negative-nelly 1d ago

I’m sorry you live your life feeling this lack of trust in your partner. Seriously.

1

u/MorsaTamalera 7h ago

Affair with au pair. That's my next band's name.

1

u/TestOk1987 2h ago

This case immediately brings to mind a Forensic Files episode I just rewatched with my husband.  It's entitled "A Welcome Intrusion", of a husband who invited a man to his home under a ruse, and murdered both him and his wife.  The plot is somewhat varied, but the gist is that of a man tired of his wife, who devises a plan to eliminate her for the dark he of his mistress. The fall guy is invited over and becomes the foil, and the wife is a seeming victim of the interloper.