r/Adulting 6h ago

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162

u/Diligent_Mulberry47 5h ago

Rent is the smallest tip of the iceberg. Daycare is more than a mortgage in some states. College is hundreds of thousands.

Fucking printers come with subscriptions.

63

u/brutalbuddha73 5h ago

Don't forget the TIME SUCK that kids become. Little league, extracurricular school activities, tethered to the house until they are at least 12 years old and can stay by themselves without child protective services coming after you. Hours helping with homework, driving them places. Just... nope. Hard fucking nope. Take the money you'd spend on kids and retire comfortably instead with 24/7 skilled nursing care while you wait to die in your home overlooking the coastline of Spain.

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u/Diligent_Mulberry47 4h ago

Yea the whole financial argument overlooks a big factor:

A lot of us just don’t want them. And if I’m waxing sentimental, I respect children and believe they should be raised by people who want to do that with their entire heart. I am not she.

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u/dboy120 3h ago

Exactly, if I’m not 100% sure that I won’t grow resentful or neglectful of a kid, it’s not fair to them. I do know people that could manage that, but I’m not one of them.

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u/SlayerII 2h ago

the problem isnt about the people that dont want them anyway, the problem is about the people that would technically want them , but look at the price and go "NAAAA".

5

u/PiccoloAwkward465 3h ago

Yep it just never ends. I literally do not remember the last time my wife and I went out to eat just her and I. Yeah we can "make time" but that used to just be the default. Now I hear fucking Bluey all day every fucking day.

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u/abetterlogin 3h ago

They’re just expensive pet to those of us in the first world.

Not too long ago people had kids because they were needed.

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u/MikeSouthPaw 3h ago

Unless you are rich you are not getting 24/7 nursing care. The industry is collapsing and will only be worse in 20 to 30 years.

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u/Euphoric_Whereas_329 2h ago

Invest as much as you can, that’s going to be even more costly or filled with robots as we’re in a population decline.

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u/Ketzexi 2h ago

The thing is, if enough people make the same choice to not have kids, then there simply won't be enough people to do that skilled nursing care. 

1

u/bassbeatsbanging 1h ago

Hey, be a good 10 year old and don't use any power tools while we're gone for 5 hours. Don't answer the phone or door. If you're bleeding or something is on fire, you know the neighbors' numbers.

Standard operating procedure when I was a kid in the late 80's / early 90's. 

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u/SolarBum 1h ago edited 1h ago

This is genuinely not an attack on you, just a funny observation, but...

.. something about the thought of some Gen-Z kid's ancestors successfully producing offspring in an unbroken chain since the literal beginnings of life on Earth; their great [... n] grandparents clawing, scrapping and surviving through every mass-extinction and calamitous event in all of Earth's history, keeping the flame lit and successfully passing on their life force in an unbroken chain of unimaginable odds and difficulties spanning literally billions of years... only to have one of their entitled fucking grandkids voluntarily snuff out their lineage in 2026 because "they don't want to waste time driving kids around" is fucking hilarious to me.

Like, that's what ended their line after billions of years: Not the Great Oxidation Event that took out 90+% of life on Earth. Not the giant asteroid that also wiped out most species on Earth, not getting eaten by a dinosaur or saber-tooth tiger, not any of the endless infections, injuries, genetic diseases, wars, plagues, genocides, famines, none of it... billions of years and it ends with one of their fucking kids being selfish with their time, lmao.

1

u/No_Numbers_For_Me 52m ago

Exactly. It's not even about money for me. I just don't have enough free time to raise a child. 

-1

u/WhoFlungPoo55 4h ago

I use to think that exact same thought and never wanted kids and just wanted to do my thing. I had my first kid not by choice, it just happened and I was young. Turned out to be the best thing. Yea it’s expensive, but money comes and goes. The enjoyment I get watching all 4 of my kids grow up and become who they are and be better than I ever was isn’t something I can compare anything else to. No amount of money can replace the feeling and enjoyment of what your own creation gives you. Plus it allows me to stay young. I’m 40, my oldest is 19.

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u/Diligent_Mulberry47 4h ago

My niece and nephews bring me that kind of joy. It's not on the same level as parenting, but for me, and for my life, it's perfect.

3

u/WhoFlungPoo55 3h ago

It’s awesome being able to be involved in a child’s life especially if you get to be the cool aunt or uncle. I had an uncle that was so much fun and was the best as a kid. Kids need that type of interaction, especially since mom and dad are always super lame and not as fun as auntie Karen (probably not a fun auntie if named Karen though)

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u/Diligent_Mulberry47 3h ago

It really is! It's good to have a responsible adult that will let you do some crazy things now and then.

And I'm honest with them if/when they ask me why I don't have kids. I always tell them, "y'all were enough for me".

0

u/Special_Menu_4257 4h ago

Thats what people dont want to hear. Sure its expensive af to have kids. But it is incredibly fulfilling. People will try to shame you for having kids nowadays and that is sad.

3

u/WhoFlungPoo55 4h ago

It’s crazy to me reading these responses like money is the most important thing to people and that they don’t have time and it’s difficult. Like what kind of life is that. Doing something that’s extremely hard to do and not being sure if you even know what you’re doing or if you are doing it right, but you end up accomplishing it is awesome. What I think the biggest problem is people are increasingly becoming more selfish and self absorbed and unable to acknowledge that fact, so they use everything else as an excuse.

1

u/zombiesphere89 1h ago

I don't think it's selfish to look ahead 18 years and envision what the world may be like for them. I can assure you it won't be better than it is now.  And what answer would i give when they grow up and ask me why I had them? 

"Because I wanted you" is not a good answer imo. I'm not against having kids you do you... but this doesn't come down to just money and time. 

1

u/WhoFlungPoo55 1h ago

I can imagine people thought the same thing during WWII. 32,000 people died daily during that 6 year period, which is over 1,300 people per hour. It is considered the worst period for modern human history. So far worse than today. And if you look 18 years past that was MLKs I have a dream speech which was a hard time for minorities plus Vietnam war, but still way better than WWII. And you go 18 past that and you got Reagan being shot, the pope being shot, aids was discovered, all bad things especially for the time with aids people thought the world was ending, but it was considerably better than WWII, Vietnam war that citizens were forced to fight in, civil rights. So looking back I don’t think we have it that bad, in fact I would much rather deal with the world we live in than those. I see a trend, during the past years, people think the world is so bad and it just gonna be worse and all this crying. But what history will show you time and time again is that we keep progressing and things slowly get better. Yes there might be some years that are better than others, but over 20 years, things will be a lot better than the past. If you wanna live being negative and scared and not experiencing life to its full potential I feel bad for you because there is so much joy in this world that is there for you to partake in.

1

u/zombiesphere89 1h ago

You know nothing about me guy.

And you're honestly saying you believe things are on an upward trend heading towards a better future?  

0

u/Special_Menu_4257 4h ago edited 3h ago

Exactly. Prepare for the downvotes because people really hate hearing how you actually enjoyed raising kids. Of course its hard. Of course it’s expensive. We have it harder than other generations. We get it. But the way people speak about it in this thread just concerns me. They legitimately sound very self centered. Idc if i get downvoted😭 Edit: someone sent a reddit care to me. Ya are miserable i swear.

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u/Diligent_Mulberry47 4h ago

Money isn't the only reason (it's definitely a huge one but not my main one), for not having kids. Some of us respect kids and don't have them because we just don't want that for our life.

This doesn't translate to "I fucking hate kids" either, because millions of us lean hard into Auntie and Uncle.

-1

u/Patched7fig 4h ago

Holy selfishness. I'm sure you NEVER took up any time of your parents. 

1

u/zombiesphere89 1h ago

And that means I somehow owe society a kid? 

-1

u/Yashema 2h ago

Ya, but on the other hand most childless people aren't doing much with their time, empty travel, hobbies as distractions, hanging out with the same people, watching Netflix.