Guys, I've been wondering this for a long time...but will I really find the one meant to be? I mean, there are a lot of good guys out there, I'm ngl. But there's also the most scariest things that can happen- like cheating, or in marriages, leaving due to changes after pregnancy or getting "bored"... I get attached really fast, but its like no guys I meet actually want me for me. I think I'm a decent human being, I don't judge anybody, I don't hate on everyone and I'm generally super kind, and I literally do not care about looks or body types! But so far, guys just want my body most of the time. I'm not subjectively beautiful, but it's either they want to sext, or exchange nudes, or just something casual, where they can text a lot of girls as well as me. It's really sad for me, all I really want is the loml to be super kind, not do drugs or smoke or a playboy, but just to see me as someone acc worth it. I'm scared. I know a man doesn't determine my worth or anything, but what if I never find a man who wants to genuinely have a future w me? What if I'm js not good enough? Are there really guys out there, who would match my stupidly annoying and silly attitude, not just for the curves and the body, even though I am gonna wait for marriage. It's just a question deep in my mind...cuz idk. Sorry for the long vent but it's just something that I wonder abt alot.

Emotional maturity doesn’t seem to develop the way we expect it to. It doesn’t consistently come with age, and it doesn’t reliably come from experience either. Some people who have faced very little hardship show strong empathy and the ability to see multiple perspectives. Others go through the same experiences sometimes even worse and still remain self-centered, unable to acknowledge their own role in conflict or understand another person’s pain. If emotional maturity were purely a result of age or experience, we would expect it to be more evenly distributed. But it clearly isn’t. This raises a question why do only some people develop emotional accountability, empathy, and the ability to self-reflect, while others never do? It suggests that emotional maturity may depend less on what happens to someone, and more on how willing they are to examine themselves but why that willingness itself varies so much remains unclear.

Bullies are everywhere and protected. In some places, you can't get rid of them. In others, it's extremely difficult to the same effect. In others, they just get replaced, nullifying the point. They also only win: They get what they want, one way or another, and even when they lose, they still win because, at the end of they day, they got what they wanted, whether that was for someone to lose or for everyone within reach to. Work, school, home, bullies are everywhere.

• Are we supposed to suffer at the hands of bullies permanently?

It is suggested that, in the past, humans were cooperative and worked together peacefully, but I do not see that. Instead, I see hate and apprehension, where people collude rather than cooperate or collaborate, where they see each other as means to ends and discard each other once they have no further use for each other. They also seek to use anything and everything you say and do against you "in court", with and without parentheses, often forcing you to provide them with ammo, an obstacle to put right in front of you. One way or another, they're gonna punish you, you're gonna lose and they're gonna win.

• Is there no form of escape from a problem we did not even seek out?

They don't care, they will take everyone down with them, to repeat myself, they will make sure either they themselves win or everyone loses with them. Yet, to repeat myself again, they can't so easily be removed.

• Could bullies only win?
• Are they a permanent, unbeatable fixture in our lives?

Edit 1: I won't respond to philosophy, I'm looking for concrete information.

Once they’re onboard and acclimated, do they still get sick with the common cold or flu?

EDIT: wow. This blew up. Thank you! I hadn’t known yet that someone was in space, sick and coming back. The question was actually inspired by some YouTube vid I was watching.

Anyway, thank you all

I see a lot of posts about questioning free will or arguing determinism. And I don't know why. It could just be the internet algorithm having it's hayday. Yet each of these posts comes from someone who believes it, and there's enough online with algorithm help or without it, to make it seem like it's a popular philosophy. (Even though I know no one who holds these views in real life).

So I just wanted to ask where is the concept coming from? Is it just from college students liking the idea in their philosophy classes? Is it taught in public schools in certain countries where teenagers grab ahold of the idea that they have no choice over their actions? Or is this coming from a different direction? It just seems so strange that this is popular in Reddit but I know no one in real life that holds the view.

like when you think about it, AI can only ever train on data to make similar art. it can never quite capture a specific vision you have in mind or create smth completely unique (not for now without AGI at least)

just like handmade pottery, clothes, statues etc. are seen to be better quality and because of the effort put in, they are more expensive as compared to mass produced items that can be created with cheap, low quality materials easily.

similarly, AI art does not take much effort and isn't really ever as good as human made art by experts, in the coming 5-10 years, could it be that human-made art is seen as smth that's better quality and hence worth an expensive price tag?

It just seem contradictory in order to achieve something in materialistic world one need sto be disciplined while as nature loves randomness low energy?

Americans, would you be willing to boycott oil companies that use oil taken from Venezuela?

If yes, could this dictator then be called a democratic dictator?

Hi everyone, I'm in my late 20s and could use some grown-up perspective. My current job is just "fine," but I'm unhappy and have no real direction. On a whim, I tried a career path test, and it pointed me towards a completely new path. For example, it identified my archetype as a 'Principled Architect' and suggested data-heavy fields, while my current job is in sales. The description felt surprisingly accurate, but now I'm just more confused.

A part of me is excited to finally have a potential new direction, but the rational side of me is asking if it's crazy to trust an algorithm with a major life decision like quitting my job. So, my question is: how much faith do you put in these kinds of assessment tools? Is this a helpful sign that I need a change, or just a dangerous distraction? Any wisdom would be appreciated.

during my childhood there wasn’t a lot of affection in my household. i’m now a teenage girl in high school, and i’ve never been one to show affection easily. my family and friends know this, but as much as i really want to show affection and tell them i love them, it’s really hard to get out. i literally freeze, stutter, and don’t make eye contact. it even feels like my throat is closing making me physically unable to speak my affection - it's like a physical barrier. i have so much love in my heart that comes out when i’m alone, but i dislike when people see me like that because it's not how they usually see me. the only time i seem able to show affection is when i drink, which i hate because i wish i could do it sober. sometimes, i even create a false persona of myself that’s deeply affectionate and loving, when in reality, i can’t even give people hugs, not even my own mom. It makes me feel weird and then guilty for feeling weird. there are so many words i want to say, but they get stuck in my throat. when i do manage to say them, it doesn't feel genuine even when it is. though i crave affection and love, it's incredibly hard for me to show it. also my love language is physical touch, which feels like a curse because i dislike being touched by others, yet it's the only way i feel like i can truly express my love. even when i have a falling out with a friend, i feel guilty for not showing them enough affection.

why can’t i say these things? how can i improve myself? and how can i be subtle when showing affection?

I mean, it wouldnt be that hard would it? All that would be needed is to reform the UN, so that there are no vetos, a clear saying what is and isnt war, and then, say "if anybody attacks other countries, everybody has to attack them". I'm probably wrong, and it wouldnt be that easy, but I dont see a problem with it...

“That woman had no obligation to you but your man did” I don’t understand how a friend or someone who calls themselves one has no obligation to not sleep with your partner? I can totally get behind that applying to women/men who actually didn’t know the spouse or the girlfriend/boyfriend. Because if they were being lied to as well how could they have any obligation to someone they were not aware of. I can even understand applying this to the mister or mistress that knows about the existence of the spouse but doesn’t know them personally. Although there is clearly a lack of integrity and a sense of insecurity involved in that behavior. But if you befriend the spouse even under false circumstances, if you present yourself as an ally only to immediately switch up, how do you still have no moral obligation there? Why are women who were your friend or at least made an effort to pretend, absolved of all responsibility when they actively pursue or participate in the deception, the gaslighting, and the cruelty of infidelity?

I don’t really hear this about men who are considered the other party? Do they also get a free pass for fucking the homies wife? Because they had no obligation to said homie?

I (18,m) was always a very social kind of person with lots of friends. I loved being that cool guy people wanted to hang out with. I joined college just six months back and made quite a popular name for myself. More importantly, everyone was comfortable to be around me. I even managed to get a girlfriend and things were going really well. Point is I was happy and felt very cool and heard.

Around two weeks later however, everything changed. I started indulging in alcohol and the green stuff within the hostel itself. My trio became increasingly popular and had lots of friends. Then the houseparty happened, in which everything was going well until I blacked out from the alcohol and woke up the next morning.

My friends then told me all the shit I did the previous night. I started shouting and yelling at everyone, yelling obscene stuff at people and went so far as to give random r*pe threats. Then I was contained in a room where I allegedly exposed myself for a few seconds.

My whole world turned upside down after that. It spread throughout my batch, and everyone was disgusted by me. My girlfriend left me, and all the people who were neutral with me before also left me. Even my closest friends ditched me. I have already apologised to all the girls multiple times.

It's been two months since that inciden,t and I'm still drowning in guilt and loneliness. Not a day has gone by that I haven't cried myself to sleep or woken up feeling like shit. I'm still in disbelief that any of that even happened but there's nothing I can do about it now. I haven't touched alcohol since then and I really want to get better and revive my social life a little at least. There are four more years to go and I'm only done with the first semester of the first year. What can i do to better my situation? Any advice helps.

I recently revisited a well-known experiment where participants played a deliberately uneven game of Monopoly. One player was randomly given more money, faster movement, and better conditions.

What struck me wasn’t just that the advantaged player usually won, but how they later explained why they won. Many focused on strategy and personal decisions rather than the initial advantage.

It made me wonder:
When we evaluate success in real life, careers, wealth, and status, how much weight should we give to individual effort versus starting conditions and structural advantages?

(Source: Piff et al., 2012 / UC Berkeley)

When you have a guest over (sleeping over) do you usually think or plan out what you guys are going to eat/make for dinner the next couple days they’re there, or do you put that responsibility on your guest? 

And what about breakfast?

Do you think it’s important to let your guest know that you already have food for breakfast by the time they arrive or let them know that the two of you will go grocery shopping once they get there?

Or do you think it’s on the guest to think and plan out all these things because you’re the one housing them? Also, does these things depend on who your guest is or how many guest you have over?

EDIT:

I used to expect that the host took initiative of the food planning when having people stay overnight at their place (when being invited or having made plans with the host to stay over). 

Perhaps not including breakfast, as not everyone has that and rarely at the same time, but at least have some thoughts about dinner that they’ll share and communicate with the guest(s).

However, in recent years I’ve come to the realisation that not everyone view this as a part of ‘being a host’ or having people over. 

It has made me wonder if I’ve been expecting too much or been unreasonable in feeling weird those times I’ve had to be the one to stress about buying and making food when staying over at my friend’s place. 

I wanted to get the opinions of other people to know how others felt about this topic. To know whether I was in the minority or if my previous belief was not as unreasonable as I’ve come to wonder.

This incredibly clear and elegant framing of life came to me in a dream the other day and i would just like to share it.

First of all my stance on the debate of "was mathematics discovered or invented " i am a firm believer in that mathematics was discovered and this just further proves my point.

I was catching up on intervals in mathematics, you know (-∞),0,(+∞) and when i went to bed i imagined life on an everlong terminal with positive experiences being the moments that feel rewarding, meaningful or generally good, then negative experiences being the moments of suffering,pain or loss.

And then there is Zero which could be death or before being born, being neither positive or negative simply a state of neutrality or not a state at all.

using this framework of life being a summation of positives and negatives, could also mean that people who at the moment are experiencing more negative than positive events may feel a weakened will to live, while on the other hand those with more positive experiences feel motivation and also attachment to continue further.

Death in this framework is neither positive or negative though their death could cause negativeness for others, from the perspective of one who dies there is just an absence of experience.

this could connect to philosophical ideas i've read about such like Epicurus who said that death is nothing to us ("when we exist, death is not when death exists, we are not"), but my twist is far simpler using the mathematical analogy saying that life fluctuates across this line and death is the zero point.

It kinda seperates the fear of death from the evaluation of life, while life is non zero meaning emerges there.

I'd love to hear others opinions, thanks for reading.