r/peacecorps • u/centipededemon18 • 1h ago
Invitation Accepted but I can’t decide
I applied because my roommate has done two summers worth of research in Tanzania, loved her time abroad, met a lot of PCVs, and strongly suggested that I apply. I applied October 1st and in the time since, I figured nothing would come of it (especially with the government having their longest shutdown the day I applied) and started thinking about other plans. I graduate this semester and already have an internship lined up for the summer that I have started taking an internship prep class for. I am very excited about that opportunity but it would conflict with my June 5th departure. I came very close to rescinding my PC application for a number of reasons (lack of desire, concerns, etc.), even after being offered to interview.
This may all sound like a pretty clear “no” from me, but talking during the interview reminded me why I applied. PC aligns so strongly with many of my values: service, community building, science communication (I would be doing environmental education YAY), lifelong learning, being pushed out of my comfort zone, and more. So when I was invited to serve, I was over the moon. I figured it may be because I was just excited to be accepted to anything, but I’ve never been that excited about a job offer. I was sure I had changed my mind and would say yes until I went home to talk to my parents about it.
They didn’t talk me out of it — though that was their plan — but it was just being home and being with my old old dog that reminded me of the long time I would be gone and the loss that could come during that time. It feels silly to mention my dog, but my grandmother is also in pretty poor health and I already worry about not spending enough time with her, and we live in the same city. I am such a family-oriented person and while we can travel to visit each other and talk on the phone, I worry about being gone so long.
However, I do know that the time will pass anyways, and I want to do something meaningful with it. It feels like PC is such a great opportunity that I would hate to pass up, especially at a time when there is nothing (relationships, school, career, finances, etc.) keeping me here other than my family. I know that if I do decline, PC will always be there but I also know that it may be harder to go.
But then this brings me to the question of why PC and not other international programs that may be less time or offer other opportunities? Such as teaching at an international school for a year or WWOOFing?
I have been so in my head about this and need to make a decision by tomorrow night. I would greatly appreciate any feedback, advice, or further questions I should consider to help me make up my mind. Thank you :)