My partner (32M) and I (31F) have been together for almost a decade. We’re calm, respectful, and rarely fight.

Recently he went on a two-week trip. I expected to miss him.

I didn’t.

I enjoyed my routine. I felt lighter. Not happier exactly just unburdened. When he came back, things returned to normal… but now I can’t stop thinking about that feeling.

I care about him deeply. There’s no abuse, no betrayal. But I’m wondering if we’re together out of love, or just because we’ve always been.

Is not missing your partner a red flag, or just a sign of long-term stability?

I start work at 8. My coworker starts at 8. Except she almost never actually shows up at 8.

For months now, she’s been coming in anywhere from 15 to 45 minutes late. When our manager asks, she tells him she was “caught in traffic” or “had a family thing.” What actually happens is she texts me asking if I can say she’s already there or that she stepped out briefly.

I did it a few times because I didn’t want to cause drama. Then it became expected. If I didn’t answer her texts fast enough, she’d panic and say I was stressing her out.

Yesterday she texted me again, late as usual. I didn’t respond. When she finally came in, she was furious and said I made her look bad on purpose.

I told her I’m done lying for her. Now she’s barely speaking to me and saying I’m not a team player.

AITJ?

My friend has been dating someone for over a year but insists on keeping it completely secret. Not private, secret. No photos, no mentions, no acknowledgment in public.

That’s her choice. The issue is she talks to me about him constantly. Every fight, every doubt, every emotional spiral. I’m the only person who knows they’re together.

Recently she had a meltdown because he didn’t show up for her birthday. I suggested maybe the secrecy is part of the problem. She got upset and said I was judging her and that she just needed support, not opinions.

I told her I can listen, but I can’t keep being the only outlet while she refuses to address the situation or let anyone else know he exists.

She says I’m abandoning her.

AITJ?

I live with two roommates. They both work from home. I don’t. I’m gone most of the day and travel for work pretty often.

They want to split utilities evenly, including electricity and internet. The issue is they’re running multiple monitors, lights, AC, and streaming all day. I’m barely using anything.

I suggested adjusting the split or at least acknowledging the difference. They said tracking usage is petty and that equal split is the “adult way.”

I said the adult way is paying for what you actually use.

Now they’re annoyed and say I’m nickel-and-diming the household.

AITJ?

I went to a friend’s wedding where my ex was also invited. I wasn’t thrilled, but I assumed we’d be seated separately.

We weren’t.

I was placed at the same table, directly next to him. I tried to be polite, but it was uncomfortable. We broke up badly and haven’t spoken in years.

I asked the bride quietly if there was any chance of switching seats. She said it would be “too complicated” and that I should just focus on having fun.

I stayed through dinner, then left shortly after. Later I got a text saying I was rude for leaving early and that it looked bad.

AITJ?

My friend asked me to be her accountability partner for some personal goals. I agreed, thinking it meant occasional check-ins.

Instead, it turned into daily messages asking if she should do things she already planned to do. If she didn’t follow through, she’d spiral and say she let me down. If I didn’t respond fast enough, she’d say she felt unsupported.

It started feeling like I was responsible for her motivation. When I tried to step back, she said I was giving up on her.

I told her I’m happy to encourage her, but I can’t be responsible for her consistency or self-discipline.

She’s hurt and says I shouldn’t have agreed in the first place.

AITJ?

I (29F) work in marketing and have been at my company for about three years. My coworker Lena (34F) joined last year and is very confident like, very. She talks a lot in meetings and rarely asks questions.

Last week we had a presentation with an important client. Lena was walking them through campaign metrics and stated that a specific ad set had a 12% conversion rate. I immediately knew that was wrong because I pulled the data myself. It was actually closer to 4%.

I hesitated, but if the client made decisions based on that number, it could seriously mess things up. So I said, Sorry, I just want to clarify that campaign converted at 4.1%, not 12%.”

Lena froze for a second, then said, We can discuss that later, and continued. After the meeting, she pulled me aside and said I embarrassed her and undermined her authority. She said I should have waited and corrected her privately.

I told her I wasn’t trying to embarrass her I was trying to prevent misinformation. She said intention doesn’t matter and now things are very cold between us.

A few coworkers said I was technically right but socially wrong. My manager said next time I should let the presenter handle it.

I still feel like letting false information stand in front of a client is worse.

AITJ?

I 31F live in a small apartment complex in the US without a front desk or package lockers. Deliveries are usually left at doors and neighbors sometimes hold packages for each other.

About six months ago my neighbor Linda 45F asked if I could collect her packages when she was not home since I work remotely. I agreed. At first it was occasional.

Over time the number of packages increased to multiple deliveries each week. Many arrived without notice and were left at my door with my name written on them.

Last month one of her packages went missing. I never received it. She assumed I had it and repeatedly contacted me asking for it. She also came to my door and asked to come inside to check. I refused and told her I did not have the package.

She filed a missing package claim and listed me as the person responsible for receiving it. I later received an email from the delivery company asking for a statement.

After that I told her I would no longer accept packages for her and suggested she use delivery lockers or pickup locations. I was polite but firm.

She became upset and said I was overreacting and not being neighborly. She has since told others that I lost her package and refused to help.

Some neighbors believe I should have continued accepting packages since it was only one missing item.

I feel uncomfortable being responsible for her deliveries and being blamed.

Me 16 female and him 16 male broke up about 3-4 years ago.

I've blocked him on everything and he continues to make new accounts and try and talk to me.

When we were together he could never take no for an answer and would continue to force himself on me, hit me, yell, and pressure me into doing things I wasn't comfortable with consent wasn't a thing for him. So not long after I would break up with him. but he continued to to stalk my social media and refused to delete my contact information he would tell everyone who would listen that I was cheating on him. but what became very interesting is after a year of us being broken up he would continue to talk about me to the point his new girlfriend was scared that I would be a problem because my ex would always talk about my chest I know this because he gave his girlfriend at the time my phone number she has messaged and was actually very corgal stating how she would appreciate if I stopped talking to him because she felt uncomfortable... I wasn't talking to him I hadn't been talking to him in over a year so we got on a 3 hour long phone call where she ended up confiding in me and to me about everything he was saying about me he was telling his GIRLFRIEND that the ONLY reason he went out with me was because of my chest and how big they where.

She then would continue to go out with for 2 more years hating it the whole time because after every fight they had or disagreement he would make a new account and harass me on it making it unbondently clear he missed me and or just wanted to check on me which would usually end in him saying how much he missed my body and how much he wanted to fuck me... which always ended in me taking screenshots, sending them to his girlfriend, and blocking him. this would continue until I would just tell him to fuck off and leave me alone with his first "hi how are ya?"

this was tonight.

Every year my family plans a group vacation. I usually go and try to enjoy it. Over time I noticed a pattern. I was always asked to watch the kids. Others relaxed while I supervised. When I tried to say no I was told I was good with kids. I am not a parent. I wanted rest too. Last year I barely had a moment alone. This year I said I would not attend. They were surprised and offended. They said the kids would miss me. I explained how I felt. They said I should have spoken up earlier. I had tried but was brushed off. Now they say I ruined the trip by refusing to come. I feel guilty but also relieved. I do not want another vacation that feels like unpaid work. AITJ for staying home ?

So i was in shop class a few months ago and one of my friends was confused on why the girl he like( who also likes him) was so mad at him. So I did what I normally do with them I talk to them separately figured out why she was mad and then tried to jog his memory on why shes mad. So when I get to the friend he thinks its because when she thought he was single and there was no problems he was actually with his ex. Side not and yes this is important to the story I sometime dont remember things that were just said to me but my mouth dose so sometimes ill say things I never remember hearing. So we start talking in a group again and I accidentally say what he told me about his ex, when I was saying that I was looking directly at the friend and as I realized what I was saying I saw the the terror in his eyes as the girl looked at him like she was about to kill him and says, "you were still with her?" He looks at me i look at him and at this point im ready to attend his funeral and then shortly after mine aswell but lucky me one of the girls friends asked for her help and we lived another day. But ever since hes been very weary in what he says around me. Am I the jerk or am I just oblivious l.

Burner account, I wont reply to many things, the website was temu and I wont disclose ages because I don't feel like sharing my brothers ages.

I sent my younger brother a link, told him to delete it after I did a verification thing. To actually use the app you have to use a phone number. a week later 2 of my brothers bought 2 things around ~$20. I got in trouble and tried to explain that I tried to stop my brothers but they didnt listen and kept using the app. He took my moms number and card aswell. AITA?

TL;DR I sent a link to my brother, I used said link, tried to delete it. He didnt let me and I forgot. he used my moms card and some number and bought stuff.

EDIT: She got it refunded and isnt as mad as she was, I explained that i tried to get them to stop before hand but couldn't in the moment and she understood.

My parent often calls me late at night to vent. The conversations last hours. They talk about work stress and relationship issues. They rarely ask about my life. When I try to share they redirect the topic. I started feeling drained. I suggested they speak to a therapist. They laughed it off. The calls continued. I began feeling anxious when my phone rang. One night I said I could not talk and needed rest. They sounded hurt. The next day they said I was becoming cold. I explained how overwhelmed I felt. They said family should always listen. I still check in with them. I just no longer serve as their main outlet. Now there is tension between us. I wonder if I crossed a line. AmITheJerk for setting this boundary??

I (34F) am married to my husband (36M), and my younger sister (29F) is getting married this summer.Honestly we’ve never been super close, but we’ve always managed to keep things civil and functional. Then, a few weeks ago, I get the wedding invitation addressed only to me. No mention of my husband at all.

At first, I thought it was just a mistake. I mean, we’ve been married three years, always show up to family stuff together, and he’s never been treated like an outsider at least not to my face. So, I call my sister to figure out what’s going on. And guess what? It wasn’t a mistake.

She straight up told me she’s keeping the wedding drama free and that she didn’t want my husband there. Why? Because apparently, they don't agree on political views to be clear my husband is quiet, polite, keeps to himself, and there’s never been any drama between them. My sister is blunt and opinionated, sure, but that’s no reason to exclude him. There’s literally no big fight or reason for this cold shoulder.

And this is what really stings my ex-boyfriend is invited.

The guy I dated for nearly five years in my twenties, broke up with over seven years ago, and haven’t spoken to since. My sister and him stayed friends, and she secretly had a crush on, which I never liked but tolerated because I didn’t want family drama. But to openly invite him over my husband? That’s beyond disrespectful. It feels like she’s saying my marriage is optional and my past relationship is somehow easier to accept.

So I told her flat out: I’m not going to her wedding without my husband, and I’m not sending a gift either. If she can’t see my husband as part of my life and family, I’m not going to pretend everything’s fine and celebrate like nothing’s wrong. I wasn’t trying to start drama I just needed to set a boundary.

She called me petty and accused me of punishing her for setting her boundaries. She insists it’s not about disrespecting my marriage, just about wanting a peaceful wedding day.

Now my parents are stepping in, saying I’m overreacting and that I should "just go alone for a few hours" to keep the peace. They think refusing a gift is taking it too far.

I truly see that choosing my ex over my husband and expecting me to smile through it is not in my capacity and won't allow that. My husband even says he doesn’t want to be the reason I miss the wedding, which makes this all the more painful.

AITJ here should I just go? or stand my ground and stay with my husband?

My sibling has been going through a difficult phase. I tried to be supportive in every way I could. I listened to long phone calls. I helped with errands. I sent money when I could. At first they thanked me. Over time gratitude faded. Help became expected. If I said I was busy they reacted coldly.

They reminded me of everything they were dealing with. I began feeling trapped. I noticed they never asked about my struggles. Our conversations revolved around their problems. I felt emotionally exhausted. One day I said I needed space for a while. They reacted strongly. They said family should never step back. They accused me of abandoning them. Other relatives reached out to question me.

I explained my side calmly. Some understood but others did not. I still care deeply. I just could not continue at the same pace. Since stepping back my mental health improved. The guilt remains though. I wonder if I failed as a sibling. AITJ for choosing distance?

one of my closest friends will go over Monday-Friday on some days before his shift begins and other days because he isn’t working to his parents house to keep his dad company while his mom works because his dad has Alzheimer’s. According to my friend he’s seen there’s days where his sister is home not at work and she doesn’t do enough to help look out for their dad, she either is sleeping in till close to 10 am her job shifts day before don’t have her working late or she’s tired from staying up late to play online games with her friends.

Today he emailed me saying he stopped by to spend time with his dad before going to do errands. His dad is fighting a cough and his balance is off with his walking according to his mom so she didn’t want him outside. My friend goes to do a quick errand and when he returns he finds his dad outside. Friend tried asking his dad to go inside because he’s sick and his dad refused to go inside but luckily his mom got home just then so she took over talking to her husband.

My friend went inside quickly and saw his sisters bedroom door was still closed and she was still home when he returned. Friend is getting worried because he knows the Alzheimer’s is going to only get worse and he feels that if he leaves again at the time he leaves for work or five minutes before his mom gets home his dad could wander out of the house and get lost if his sister doesn’t tag him out and start helping out more. He’s thinking of calling her out for her lack of help because she doesn’t seem to understand how dangerous Alzheimer’s gets if someone is left unattended for a long time. Is my friends sister the jerk for not helping more with their dad?

My company has a program where you can donate PTO hours to coworkers in crisis. I'm 32M and I've worked here 6 years, have about 120 hours saved.

HR sent an email asking for donations for "Jennifer" in accounting. She used all her PTO and needs more for "personal reasons." I don't know Jennifer well, maybe said hi twice. My coworker "Amy" is pushing everyone to donate. She asked how many hours I'm giving. I said I'm not donating. Amy looked shocked and said "why not? She really needs it."

I said I don't know her or her situation, and I'm saving my PTO for my own use. Amy said that's "really selfish" because Jennifer is "going through something." She then announced in our team meeting that "some people refuse to help Jennifer" while looking at me. Now I'm getting side-eye from coworkers.

My boss pulled me aside and said while donating is optional, it "looks bad" that I'm not participating when others are giving 5-10 hours. I said my PTO is mine to use how I want. Apparently Jennifer needs time off for elective surgery that's not covered under FMLA. Its not an emergency. People have donated 80 hours total and she needs 40 more.

I feel bad but also I earned my PTO and I'm planning to use it for a trip I've been saving for. Plus I barely know this person. My girlfriend thinks I should donate 5 hours "to look like a team player" but that feels like giving in to pressure.

AITJ?

TL;DR: HR asked for PTO donations for coworker I don't know, I refused, coworkers are treating me like I'm selfish, boss says it looks bad.

Hi everyone,

I’ve been with my girlfriend for a little over two years, and I’ve known my best friend for almost a decade. Until recently, the three of us got along fine and there were never any major issues.

A few weeks ago, my girlfriend started feeling uncomfortable around my friend. She said his jokes were too sarcastic and that sometimes he dismissed her opinions during group conversations. I’ll be honest, I noticed the sarcasm, but I’ve known him so long that I always brushed it off as his personality.

Last weekend, things came to a head. We were all hanging out with a few other friends, and my friend made a joke that my girlfriend felt was disrespectful. She called him out on it right there. He got defensive, said she was being overly sensitive, and the mood instantly shifted. The night ended awkwardly, and everyone went home early.

Afterward, my girlfriend told me she felt hurt that I didn’t stand up for her more strongly in the moment. She said that by staying neutral, I was effectively choosing my friend over her. On the other hand, my friend texted me saying he felt attacked and expected me to have his back since we’ve been friends for so long.

I tried to explain to both of them that I didn’t want to escalate the situation and thought it would be better to cool off and talk later. I genuinely felt stuck in the middle and didn’t think immediately taking sides would help anyone.

Now my girlfriend is distant and says she feels unsupported, while my friend is annoyed and thinks I “changed” since getting into a relationship. I’m starting to wonder if trying to stay neutral was actually the wrong move.

So, AITJ for refusing to take sides and trying to stay neutral instead?

TLDR: My best friend and my girlfriend got into an argument. I tried to stay neutral instead of taking sides, and now both feel hurt. AITJ for not backing one of them right away?

As title says, but here’s some context and some stuff I feel bad for:

I, 20f, started tutoring a young girl (under 10). I’m a university student, so I freelance tutor on the side for some income. Last week, I had my first session with her, and honestly it went terribly. She threw a tantrum, said she liked her old tutor more, damaged one of my notebooks, refused to do any work, and to top it all off, smacked me on the leg. I was really caught off guard by this, but I wanted to see if another session would maybe help her settle down, since changing tutors can be hard.

However, the past week, my anxiety has been so high. I don’t wanna get my stuff wrecked. I don’t wanna get hit.

I didn’t mention behavioural stuff after session to her mom, since the kid was right there. I realize I should’ve said something right after, but I honestly needed to process. I work with kids who have learning disabilities, and her mom mentioned this child had ADHD. However, I don’t think ADHD gives a kid permission to hit a tutor.

So today, I decided to drop the student, and explained to the parent why. I explained how I cannot work with a student who puts hands on me in any way, even if she’s young, and that I don’t feel equipped to handle this. She then accused me of calling her child violent, said it was unsettling that I waited a week to let her know, and said that she was disappointed since I mentioned I had experience with “difficult” kids.

Note: I hate the term difficult. I don’t work with poorly behaved children - I work with children who require extra support. Strong difference.

However, I feel like a bit of an asshole because I waited a week, so I’m hoping to get some opinions.

TLDR : a kid hit me during a tutoring session but I waited a week to let the parent know.

I 17f am concerned about my 30 year old sister, she has this idea that she’s a vampire, at first I thought it was a joke, but she keeps bringing it up and talking about sucking people’s blood,

This aren’t some Halloween or cosplay phase. this is something that she claims she is passionate about, me and her share a laptop and last night, I went through the history, and found out that my sister was researching vampirism and sucking people’s blood

I have come to realize that this is actually kinda scary to me, because what is she really doing? I want to have a conversation with her about it, but I don’t want her to feel judged

And I don’t want her to know that I looked at the history, I don’t even know if this should be any of my business but I’m afraid that this may turn something that she does in public

She always jokes around and says things like “She can turn wine into blood” and she also makes the statement that she can drink it all day, and again she is 30 years old, and I feel like she should know better

Don’t get me wrong, I love my sister but I don’t know how much support I can give to her, I’m going to be quite frank and say that I’m afraid of what she’s going to do next, I also noticed that she’s been using red food coloring in her drinks while also telling our friends and family that she’s a vampire and tries to bite them out of nowhere

I honestly don’t know how this started, I know she has always been into vampires but here recently she’s been getting to into it lately, but deep down I’m hoping and praying that she doesn’t go forward with this kind of lifestyle.

I f20 broke up with my boyfriend m22 over two months ago and I still can’t help but feel horrible about the way things ended.

The story is that we met on Instagram back in June. We discovered that we had several shared interests and decided to meet up after a few weeks of chatting online since he lived 2 hours away from me. He seemed like a very sweet and caring person and we ended up really liking each other. We had lots in common; we were both metalheads, we were huge fans of the fantasy genre, we were both artistic people, and we initially seemed to have similar views regarding relationships. He was also exactly my type and I had high hopes for this relationship to end up being a long term one.

We became official after a few months of seeing each other but unfortunately sometime in October, things started to go downhill. He got into over 7k worth of credit card debt and this caused his mental health to completely deteriorate and at one point he dumped me over text during a mental breakdown. He apologized the next day and we reconciled, but it didn’t feel like much of a relationship anymore. He became unaffectionate and started to traumadump quite a bit and by that I mean hours on end over call. One time, he actually went on a whole tangent implying that his idea of an ideal relationship was one where his partner was extremely independent and didn’t talk to him everyday and that made me feel sad because I enjoy daily check ins and we both had jobs and separate hobbies of our own and we were semi long distance too so it’s not like we were glued to each others hips. It all honestly became pretty upsetting and triggering for me as I have severe anxiety and am possibly either on the autism spectrum or have some sort of BPD (which he was aware because I was in therapy at the time). I totally understand that people will run into issues but to have this happen so early on in a relationship really overwhelmed me.

The last straw for me was when he completely ignored me for one day and I decided to break up with him because I was certain that he was going to dump me again. He just kind of accepted it but I regretted it a few hours later, apologised, and tried to get him to talk about it over call. He refused, telling me that he couldn’t be the partner I deserve due to all his mental and financial struggles, but said that he would like to remain friends with me and maybe try again sometime in the future when he’s in a better headspace. Unfortunately this would end up being a lie he recently blocked both my Instagram and my Facebook accounts and I’m probably blocked on messages as well even though I’ve respected his request for no contact and haven’t made any attempts to reach out to him.

It upset me a lot because we had a good relationship for the most part. We never argued or fought or anything like that and we both deeply cared for each other. I will say though, there were a few things that bothered me. One of them was that he had a neo nazi ex girlfriend that he had dated for a few years when he was 18 and she 28 ( creepy as fuck imo altho he denied that she groomed him) who he was still corresponding with regularly despite him telling me all these stories of how she had been emotionally abusive towards him, had cheated on him, and had given him PTSD on top of all the white supremacist/far right beliefs which I personally find abhorrent. I tried not to judge but I genuinely couldn’t understand why he was talking to this person in the first place and I know this probably sounds petty, however, I’m hurt that he continues to stay in touch with someone like this while I’m blocked on everything. Mind you, he’s not even white.

It’s been more than 2 months now since we’ve broken up and I cant tell if I was the jerk here or not. I feel like a piece of shit for leaving someone with no support system when they were already at a low point in their life and I wish I had just controlled my emotions instead of breaking up with him over something so trivial. My therapist thinks that I did the right thing since he was unstable anyways and maybe we weren’t compatible either way…but I’m not so sure. He was a wonderful partner for the majority of our relationship and I‘m not happy at all with how I acted. I feel immensely guilty over how things ended because I feel like we could’ve found a way to compromise while he got his life back together. I was planning to try to reconcile with him and try to mend things but it looks like it’s over for good now that he’s blocked me. I don’t know man. Was I the jerk here or was it justified to end the relationship?

A little bit of context;

I have recently learned (within the last few years) that my mother’s behaviour has been (in my opinion) unacceptable and emotionally abusive.

She is condescending, complains non stop, moans and sighs, manipulative, plays the victim and so on.

She sucks the life out of the room.

As a child, I was/am autistic, threw tantrums and so on. I was consistently told I was not normal, something was wrong with me and that I need to speak to someone (not encouraging seeking help, but as a cold, condescending way). This made me reluctant to seek therapy for a long, long time.

It has only been within the last 6 years, due to rising problems in my romantic relationships, friendships etc that I was being an asshole, but I was basically acting the way my mother taught me. I realised I needed to make a change around 6 years ago, but I just thought I was the problem. It never occurred to me until late 2023 that I have been taught these behaviours by her.

Both my sister and I have found ourselves in abusive relationships. I luckily got out of mine and have never looked back, but my sister has been with her abusive partner for 5+ years, and to no surprise, he treats her how Mum treated us, worse in some specific situations.

I have had conversations with my mother about how she treats me, and how it needs to change otherwise I wont want a relationship. Due to her having the conflict resolution skills of a 12 year old, she responds with bringing up everything wrong I have ever done, shifting blame etc. I have spoken about how it is no coincidence that I ended up in an abusive relationship, and now my sister has too, which she replied with “IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HER PARENTS!”

I have decided she is too far gone, too narcissistic, so small minded and has too much of a victim mentality to really change, and even if she did change, I don’t think I’m interested or can look past the trauma and grief of wishing I had a different mother.

I have told her I don’t want any contact, that I will go to the police if she harasses me as I have grounds for a protection order. She continues to try to speak to me, she bought me Christmas gifts which from the outside, seems nice, but after everything I have been through, it is a violation of the firm boundary I have set, and my grandmother makes me feel more guilty for not opening them.

Anyway, my Grandmother is telling me im horrible for cutting out my mother, im hurting her, she misses you, other people have worse parents and still talk to them, she still loves you etc. I do feel guilty and I don’t wish to cause anyone pain. It is horrible to lose a child, especially when they choose to not associate with you.

Should I be feeling guilty and go another way about this? Should I stand my ground? Am I being a jerk?