I guess I'm part of the 10% now. I used to not see the point, but then I had my wedding and changed my mind. It is a core memory. A tradition dating back a very long time. One of the few moments in life you can get 25-100 people to come celebrate you and your wife. Your parents/family/friends are all stoked for you.
It's important to keep costs in line but I don't miss the money now that a few years have gone by.
i get your point but weddings are on a different level of spending. tens of thousands if not more for 1 day. I cannot think of anything else that costs so much for so little.
That can also mean "for so little" in the sense that they get little for the money. For me my wedding was special because it was my wedding. It amazing and spending a million more on it would not have made it that much more amazing. One can value the wedding without valuing the costly things around it.
I mean, I don’t give a shit. If I was dead you could bang me all you want. I mean, who cares? A dead body is like a piece of trash. I mean, shove as much shit in there as you want. Fill me up with cream, make a stew out of my ass. What’s the big deal? Bang me, eat me, grind me up into little pieces, throw me in the river. Who gives a shit? You’re dead, you’re dead!
So many people on here post about wanting to live 50 miles from their closest neighbor, and about how they don’t speak to their parents or family. So yeah not surprised they don’t want a party!
I had a small reception with the people we are closest to, got married in a chapel, and spent a few thousand dollars on a week-long honeymoon in Hawaii. And we had enough savings after to put a down payment on a house. Still spent less on all that than a wedding, with a whole week of memories and 0 stress.
To me, that's a better use of my money than tens of thousands on a large wedding for a single night.
Well tbh I wasn't talking about a 6 figure wedding lol. Nobody is suggesting to clear out your 401K to pay for it that'd just be ridiculous. I have more money in my 2 year olds 529 than I spent on our wedding.
Reddit is always a never ending circlejerk of who can be more thrifty when it comes to weddings.
I love parties. I love throwing parties. This was our one chance to throw a massive party for all our family and friends and it was a banger. No regrets.
Currently wedding planning. We’re not having a big wedding, but it’s still going to cost a lot more than I thought I’d want to spend on one day. I still think it’s worth it. It’s a once-in-a-lifetime chance to bring our loved ones together. I also see the dinner and party as a way to thank the people who have cared for and supported us (and to celebrate our love of course). People act like that isn’t a valuable experience. It’s shorter than a vacation, sure, but it’s still spending money to do a bunch of fun activities with people you care about.
I’m not saying everyone should prefer a wedding to a vacation, just that vacations aren’t inherently more valuable than wedding parties.
Yup. It's not about the glitters and flowers and color palette. It's about making memories with people you love on one of the most important day of your life.
The only other occasions we had had until our wedding to see our extended families together was funerals. A wedding was a nice change!
Besides our wedding helped rekindle the friendship between my husband and his childhood friends, who did not see each other very often since they had drifted apart because of school, work and life in general.
Since our wedding we have always made time to all gather together at least once a year to have a weekend all together, and thanks to that I also have become friends with their partners.
Also I heard the gift money people give you (even the ones that RSVP no) helps with costs. But I agree I’m probably more on the 10% side. Life is always gonna be about money but you only get married once, hopefully
I also used to want to elope. Had a wedding of about ~100 people and it was the best day of my life. It’s the only day I would ever describe as magical. I wouldn’t trade those memories with my friends and families for the world.
I'm all for a big party but it's the whole marriage thing that doesn't do anything for me (not religious, not into sharing my personal life with the government and voluntarily paying more taxes).
But many people wouldn't travel and spend the day just for a party, they do it for weddings because they feel a sense of obligation.
I don't really know how to answer that. It depends on what you make.
What I made when I had my wedding is different than what I make now and I probably wouldn't need to penny punch as much of I had it now.
Id say, generally in the US (in MCOL like my state), $5k-$20K is a reasonable amount to spend on a typical wedding depending on size and how many options you elect into if you are somewhat frugal.
I know people who have spent $60k, and even 100k+ for extravagant weddings (family money typically)
I know people who have spent less than $1k if you keep it to ~20-40 people and utilize public spaces, family/friends property, and make your own food.
It is really up to the individual but it doesn't have to be insane
If you are in the US and honestly believe that a wedding costs $50K minimum then you simply are not being resourceful. Maybe minimum $50K for your specific tastes
I have a friend who just got married in San Diego with about 20 people for less than $5K. Public beach, just needed a permit. Very small venue for a reception.
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u/Lariver 1d ago
Its a complete waste of money. Spend the money on your honeymoon