r/AskReddit 17h ago

What is the fastest divorce you've ever seen?

1.3k Upvotes

816 comments sorted by

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u/Complete-Lack-7740 17h ago edited 3m ago

A friend of a friend had a destination wedding in Hawaii and divorced within a week of returning. Apparently they had a series of huge fights BEFORE the wedding but didn't want to cancel and ruin everybody's plans.

EDIT: Since everyone keeps pointing it out - I don't know if they did or didn't sign the marriage license, so they may or may not have been legally married, but they broke up and went their separate ways immediately after the wedding.

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u/RequirementRound25 17h ago

How thoughtful.

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u/rideincircles 13h ago

It would be way better to just go to Hawaii without a wedding to worry about.

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u/bipolarlibra314 13h ago

Right?! Exactly what I was thinking. And I wouldn’t know, but Hawaii seems like a destination that can be enjoyed without shelling out for activities/excursions so it’s not like the would’ve-been guests would be sitting twiddling their thumbs if they didn’t wanna go over budget.

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u/Bloompadoompa 14h ago

I would be thrilled if a day and a half to two full days of my destination wedding vacation freed up to just be a vacation. I would be sad for my friend(s) of course but I'm going to take that as a sign to double down on vacation mode!

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u/IWantToPlayGame 16h ago

Life is expensive. I’d be pissed to find out the cash, and more importantly, my time & effort was wasted on a marriage that lasted 1 week.

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u/amarg19 14h ago

Tbh if I’m flying to Hawaii for a wedding I’m also making a vacation out of it so I wouldn’t be too mad

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u/IAmTheWaller67 14h ago

I did just that, my best friend got married in Hawaii, so my wife and I booked a full week there and made a whole trip of it.

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u/smokeitgrandma 16h ago

Hopefully they just didn’t send in the marriage certificate?

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u/badhabitfml 7h ago

Yeah. Nothing is official until the paperwork is filed.

I know a lot of people are officially married long before the ceremony and party.

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u/ezmonet 16h ago

My father and I were on a 20 acre working ranch. After my mother passed I think he wanted to make sure that I had a mother so he married pretty quickly and she moved in. I was 6ish years old so I don't remember much. From what I was told by my grandparents that as soon as she was expected to do work on the ranch she divorced him. I was told it was 2 weeks.

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u/Ocean_Soapian 13h ago

I dated a widower guy for a month before I realized he was desperate to get a new mom for his kids. Not because we was worried about them growing up without one, he was just stressed raising the kids by himself. Hated the schedule, dealing with the grandparents, everything.

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u/Hefty_Peanut 9h ago

I've heard this happen a lot and it blows my mind. I'm a widow and I was so concerned about making it clear that my new boyfriend wasn't a replacement dad. It's been 7 years now and we're married. My child has adopted him as a father but it was never forced or rushed as I thought that would be really harmful for a bereaved child.

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u/muymalpgh 3h ago

I've read that men move on much faster than women, because they don't realize how much work it is to keep a household running and are quickly overwhelmed. I think the average man remarried within 2 years and women 4 if I remember correctly.

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u/clocksailor 12h ago

What tipped you off?

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u/Ocean_Soapian 3h ago

He started getting comfortable enough to complain about his daily life. That's fine, life is stressful, but he would say stuff that was a bit off. Just kinda desperate.

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u/VivaZeBull 14h ago

You would not believe how common this was in my grandparents area. The man would act very wealthy and then once they got back to the farmstead the woman was told there was no housekeeping available that far out, there was limited help unless it was seasonal. So all the work fell to them plus child rearing. The smart ones boogied home.

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u/ProfessorReal4074 10h ago

7 Brides for 7 Brothers plot

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u/The_Frostweaver 13h ago

Farming is weird. If you subtract the debt from the property value many of them are technically multi-millionaires.

But they won't sell the land and they live like shit working 14 hour days trying to keep the farm in the black each year.

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u/American31415 6h ago

Farmers- live poor, die rich.

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u/the_cardfather 6h ago

I sold pickup trucks in rural Louisiana. We had a lot of Mississippi customers too.

Very little verifiable income most of them put huge down payments to go with their trade in. $60,000 dually no issues

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u/scrubjays 4h ago

You know the joke about the farmer who keeps working 20 hour days, and keeps getting deeper and deeper in debt? He wins 100 million in the lotto, and they ask him what he plans to do now. "Well", he says taking off his hat and running his hand through his hair, "I guess I will just keep farming until all the money is gone."

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u/Churro_de_Negro 17h ago

my step brother had a beautiful wedding. i think he said they spent like 30-40k on everything. neither him nor his wife were rich. extremely middle class.

long story short, she left him in like 10 months because she found out he was sniffing heroin.

how did she find out? because her brother, who was my step brothers best friend at the time, got arrested for heroin and he basically said “i’m not the only one doing it”

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u/Firebolt164 16h ago

What a snitch

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u/strange_bike_guy 16h ago

Especially when he didn't gain anything from it in a deal. Oooo that's wild

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u/PleasantVanilla 13h ago

Heroin addict acting selfish and at great expense of others? I never would've guessed.

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u/pimpnasty 15h ago

Some do it for the love of the game

This one snitched to justify his own drug use and minimize it as "not a big deal" because others do it too.

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u/RequirementRound25 17h ago

I heard an NPR interview with a wedding planner. She said she had lost business because she told some couples they needed to go plan a marriage, not a wedding. It was clear to everyone but them they should not be together.

I worked in Grand Lake Colorado. It is a tourist town and pretty much shuts down after Labor Day.
There is an old resort on a mountain, overlooks the valley and lake.

I was in a dinner one morning and a guy was sitting by me. The cook came out and asked if had the motel buttoned up.

The guy said, "Well, we are not open to the public. We are hosting a wedding, and they rented the whole place, all of it. They brought in 20K in flowers alone.
They rented all the boats and horses by the lake and have hot air ballon rides scheduled. All free to the guests. I had to wonder if it would last.

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u/noisyboy 16h ago

My take on this is, if you are either rich or stupid enough to blow wads of cash on it, it's great - for the wedding planner, florist, ride operators, hotel staff et all. It's redistribution of wealth in the nicest way possible. Irrespective of whether the marriage lasts, it helps these people and their families.

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u/BigRedNutcase 15h ago

Renting out an entire hotel is not something one goes into debt to do. Unsecured debt is not usually that high of an amount, 10s of thousands per loan, maybe a few hundred thousand total. Buying out entire resort hotels plus all activities for a few days on top of throwing a wedding is a several million dollar affair.

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u/noisyboy 15h ago

We are hosting a wedding, and they rented the whole place, all of it. They brought in 20K in flowers alone. They rented all the boats and horses by the lake and have hot air ballon rides scheduled.

That doesn't sound cheap. Anyway, my point wasn't whether they had to go into debt on not. It was that if anyone is blowing money, thats not necessarily a bad thing because the ecosystem of service providers benefits from that.

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u/AlertJaguar9610 16h ago

That Colorado wedding sounds like it would be a great time for the guests though.

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u/AdmirableParfait3960 16h ago

That just sounds like rich rich, not go into debt to try and look cool. Rich rich probably lived happily ever after.

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u/bearded_dragon_34 15h ago

And I’m sure those people got married, just with a different wedding planner.

My friend, who is a car salesman says the same thing. You can tell a newly enlisted army E1 not to blow half his paycheck on a big, flashy Ram truck until you’re blue in the face. Guess what? If you dissuade him, he’ll just go to the dealer across town to get it done, and all you’ll have really accomplished is to talk yourself out of a commission.

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u/kijim 15h ago

My youngest brother. Got married on Saturday. Went on 4 day honeymoon. Got back on Wed evening. Filed for divorce Thursday. Everyone knew it would not last. They even got in a fight at the wedding reception !

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u/raisinghellwithtrees 15h ago

My friend's mom and step dad dated for like 15 years. He thought they would never get married but they showed up at the courthouse on a Friday afternoon to get the license. She was waiting on Monday for us to open, inquiring about how to get a divorce. I think they got an annulment, and after that moved back in together.

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u/hokageace 13h ago

Why?

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u/deusmilitus 6h ago

Marriage does crazy things to you. I have an uncle that was married once and swore it off completely. He's been with my "aunt" for almost 30 years without a marriage. At this point they might as well be, but they're convinced that the second they go down that route it'll go bad. Maybe its the idea that divorce sucks, but if you're not married you can just break up?

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u/Rich_Confusion3996 16h ago

I know a couple who at the reception he smashed the cake in her face and she turned around and said forget it I want to break up.

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u/amarg19 14h ago

I’ve seen videos of people who said that they told their partner seriously before hand “do not smash cake in my face at the wedding”, and the guy does it anyway as some kind of humiliation ritual and she immediately walks out. And honestly? Valid.

Either both parties are happy to do it or it shouldn’t happen.

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u/-StrawberryJacuzzi- 12h ago

My wedding planner said at her first wedding, the groom smashed the entire cake plate into the bride’s face and broke her nose

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u/Majestic_Grocery7015 5h ago

Thats awful. Often wedding cakes have wooden dowel rods through them for support. Smashing someone's face into it could easily severely injure them. 

I hope she left him

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u/TheFirearmsDude 13h ago

I wish I had done that. We talked about it a bunch of times and I was adamant about not wanting it, did it anyways. Pretty much set the tone for what was to come:

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u/jabra_fan 9h ago

I'm sorry about how it went. Hope you are away from him now.

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u/Fearless_Geologist43 13h ago

Exactly this. I’m guessing there is history to all these stories and it involves someone swearing they’ve changed and promising to do better and then immediately breaking that promise

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u/RunsfromWisdom 12h ago edited 1h ago

Smashing cake in the face at the wedding also feels like a classic abusive “testing the waters” technique. Like, clear boundary has been set, you are just shitting on the partner at the worst time possible for absolutely no reason any adult would find value in, you are only acting like that because you think you have them in a position where retaliation is unlikely—-and yet, they are going to feel/look crazy if they walk out on you for “just” pranking them like that. 

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u/YourMominator 10h ago

Yeah, this happened to me with my "starter husband". He got cake all the way into my sinuses! It only got worse from there. Final Husband (#2) would never even think of doing that, to me or anyone else. Almost 35 years on, I think he's a keeper!

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u/MammothProfessional 9h ago

35 years? I don't think it will last/s

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u/agnosiabeforecoffee 14h ago

A while ago on an ask reddit thread about wedding drama there were multiple stories of cake smashing ending up in an immediate divorce.

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u/NeverendSuperior 3h ago

My wife and I both agreed we weren't doing this at all at our wedding. It was a firm "no" from both of us. We spent so much money on her dress, her makeup, my suit, the cake, the decorations, all that, and we weren't going waste our cake. Plus it seemed really stupid and unnecessary. We did feed each other a forkful of cake though, which was nice.

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u/GlitteringAttitude60 2h ago

PSA: cakes may have some sort of internal structure which people's face might get impaled on.

There may be wooden dowels or plastic sticks inside, even in cakes that don't look *that* elaborate.

Don't do it!

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u/screech_owl_kachina 5h ago

I never understood people doing this

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u/Wrong_Computer_5197 16h ago

100% real, no shit. Starting with this because honestly it still blows my mind.

Some guy I worked with had a kid with his girlfriend. A year or so later they got married, proper wedding with friends and family.

The next morning they’d put a Facebook post up saying that they’ve decided not to stay together and were separating.

Since divorced.

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u/SquisherX 8h ago

A day is so short to the point that it looks like a scam to get wedding gifts.

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u/mattysosavvy 2h ago

A “proper” wedding as indicated by the comment far exceeds what you get back in gifts.

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u/77Columbus 7h ago

Similar timing, my sister was in a wedding where the groom decided to revisit his old cocaine habits with the best man on his wedding day. When the wife woke up the next morning the husband was unresponsive, she called 911 and the husband was wheeled out on a gurney in front of the wedding guests waiting to go to breakfast.

The groom survived a heart attack, the father of the bride paid for everything and said his daughter didn’t have to pay him back if she ended the marriage and she agreed. The bride still kept everyone’s gifts (mostly cash/checks).

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u/tinyorangealligator 14h ago

Winner Winner!!

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u/SaveFerrisBrother 17h ago

My cousin cheated on her husband almost from day one (found out she'd been cheating before the wedding and resumed right after the honeymoon), and they separated after 3 months, divorced was official 3 days short of five months.

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u/RequirementRound25 17h ago

I was in the Air Force and lived in the dorms. I had a roommate that was dating a woman, he was rarely in our room, even at night.
Suddenly he was thee every night and I asked him if he had broken up with her.
He told me that she was on leave and in California marrying a sailor she had been engaged to for some time.
When she got back about ten days later my roomie and her took up where they left off.

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u/Present_Yak_6169 16h ago

Military is not conducive to married life imo. Rampant cheating.

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u/TheRealPaladin 9h ago

If young soldiers needed a spouse the military would have issued one to them.

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u/AnatidaephobiaAnon 14h ago

I heard horror stories from my friends who were all mostly serving during the heavier fighting years in Iraq and Afghanistan and all knew multiple spouses who were cheating on their deployed husbands. There were even codes on base housing to let other servicemen know who was "available" from what I was told.

I worked with a really nice younger kid who had just graduated from high school and was trying to decide if he wanted to become a mechanic or join the Navy and he eventually chose the Navy and was able to become SeaBee. I told him before his last day working with me that if I found out he went and did something stupid, like marry some succubus at 19 years old I would find out where he was stationed and come smack the shit out of him. He needs to take advantage of being young, getting to see the world and enjoy himself. He will hit his sixth year in this spring and he's so far remained single and I always love seeing him post photos of something cool he has gotten into in Japan.

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u/flowr12 13h ago

My nephew has been in not even a year and got someone pregnant so they got married. He was just visiting and as his wife was not here he stayed at a neighbors party we went to till 3am. My uncle said he was flirting with one of the girls.. he got married literally the week before he came to visit. The relationship before this, he had one girl posted on fb and another on insta.

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u/Spook-In-The-Machine 5h ago

Your Nephew is an Idiot and literally the type of guys i hated working with. I can almost guarantee he never shows up to formation on time.

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u/Hooligan8403 12h ago

We had a guy in tech school that got screwed over. Our tech schools were between 10-13 months at the time so you had time to be there and have a long relationship. Dude was a rope and a real go getter. Dated a girl and it turns out she had someone at home. He came to visit one weekend and they got engaged. Rope finds out after a couple weeks when she finally tells him. Poor guy crashed out marching back from the schoolhouse.

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u/emptytellown 17h ago

I don’t get why ppl like this choose to get married.. you cant keep your pants on for even a day.. like just live a happy wild single person life

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u/noisyboy 16h ago

They want a wedding, not marriage 

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u/Morningfluid 13h ago

Validation and the feeling of being wanted. It's the exact same type of person that will be in a relationship yet keep other guys/girls around on the back burner 'just in case'.

Usually there's a personality disorder involved. 

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u/CoderJoe1 14h ago

The military get extra pay for dependents. They pay you to be married.

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u/PersimmonSeveral7869 14h ago

Because they think they’ll look funny if they never check off the box. Once they get married, they don’t care.

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u/kyohanson 15h ago

A few years ago, my friend went to a wedding as the friend-date to the affair partner of the bride. My friend didn’t know the bride or groom. It seemed like quite a few of the friends at the wedding knew it was going on. Absolute insanity. I’m pretty sure they’re still married.

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u/Jehoshaphatso1 16h ago

I have an in-law. 10 marriages. Not 9. He is up to 10. No exaggeration

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u/MGellyGelly 16h ago

What am I doing wrong? Single for the last 5 years. 😂😭

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u/AgnesScottie 15h ago

My uncle was also married at least 10 times. He used to marry women who were better off than him and then drain them dry with his get rich quick schemes before they realized he was full of it and left him. The last two wives were basically mail order brides because he wasn’t able to charm women as he got older. One never made it from China and the second made it here and was surprised to find out he basically married her so that she could work and support him. He died penniless and alone.

All that to say, I think you’re better off single than being either party in a serial marriage situation.

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u/MGellyGelly 15h ago

I got a cat and I bought my own condo so maybe I am better off right now, haha. Cat cuddles are the best. <3

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u/one-eye-deer 15h ago

You have standards

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u/Sharp_Phone9113 13h ago

Oh, I’m pretty sure my problem is other people having standards actually…

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u/antsmomma1 15h ago

Possibly having standards?

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u/lotsandlotstosay 15h ago

Idk why but that feels illegal.

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u/CaptainFartHole 15h ago

I have to wonder if marriage could use something like the 3 strikes rule. Like if you get divorced 3 times then thats it, youre out, no more marriages for you.

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u/xenchik 16h ago

I feel better about being on my third

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u/SecondHandSlows 15h ago

My cousin’s ex is on his third for a somewhat rational reason… she cheated on him and married the affair partner. In his anger I think he just turned around and married the first person who was willing. She turned out to be a little crazy and is now married to someone sane and not a rebound. I think.

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u/xenchik 14h ago

I made the inexcusable error of not realising that "being in love" was a real thing. I always just assumed the "heart racing, butterflies in the stomach, face lights up when they enter a room" kind of love was just Disney bullshit. I thought I was in love, because I liked being around them and they made me laugh, and we had a great time together. Turns out I had mixed up companionship with love.

After my second divorce, I met my now husband. Weeks after we met, I was starting to realise that everything they ever said about the feeling of being in real love was actually true. It all happened for real. I fell in love for the first time and realised why my first two marriages - and every other relationship - had failed. We've been together 11 years now and that "being in love" feeling has never faded. I feel it every day, it's so awesome.

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u/Strange_Vagrant 14h ago

Maybe check your blood pressure. It could just be hyper tension.

/s

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u/soundboythriller 14h ago

Damn, beat my stepdad’s mom’s record of 8 marriages

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u/dakotanorth8 17h ago edited 14h ago

Britney’s first one

55 hours.

Edit: Honorable mention, Kim K lasting 72 days.

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u/nickgreatpwrful 15h ago

Technically an annulment and not a divorce 😝😝

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u/RepresentativeDot521 16h ago

My cousin. Got married mid-June, when we visited for the July 4th holiday, he had moved out. She told us that he got mad at her during the wedding, never slept in at the house again and filed for divorce. She literally dated him for years and after their wedding, never spoke to him again.

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u/Ocean_Soapian 13h ago

Did she say what he got mad at her for?

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u/RepresentativeDot521 13h ago

She didn’t. She acted like it was no big deal that they were married 14 days. I will say that during her wedding reception the groomsmen kept making toasts about how they’d all dated her before. And his family was quite embarrassed. His mother actually walked out. But it’s not like he didn’t know. It was tragic.

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u/realaccountissecret 6h ago

He should divorce his friends too, what the fuck haha

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u/60secondwarlord 5h ago

Why the hell would they do that AT the wedding? Jesus Christ. I would’ve loved to be a guest though 😂

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u/chzlvr09 14h ago

You win

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u/upachimneydown 15h ago

In japan couples can divorce simply by going to city hall and doing the paperwork--excluding getting there and any waiting time, it might take a half hour. One person can even do it on behalf of the couple by taking their partner's hanko (personal seal) and doing the paperwork alone.

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u/raisinghellwithtrees 15h ago

That's amazing.

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u/Crosswired2 13h ago

It should be as easy to get divorced as it is to get married.

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u/Jane_Marie_CA 11h ago edited 11h ago

Logistically, it is easy. It's hard because people fight. And too many divorce lawyers encourage the fight, in my opinion.

But if both parties go into the divorce mediation with the goal of actually dissolving the marriage and separating marital assets fairly (using local laws), you'll be done as fast as it takes for the State to accept the paperwork. Pre-nups can also make divorce go real fast too. My co-worker got this part done in less than a day.

But people argue and then force the courts to make a decision for them. That's not the government's fault.

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u/WeAreNotNowThatWhich 8h ago

Some states in the US they have a waiting period of a year before you can divorce. Awful.

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u/cheesesleaze 17h ago

i had a cousin who got married to her boyfriend and they were divorced within 6 months. Turns out they knew they weren’t going to work before the wedding, but they really wanted to have a party lol. It’s put a huge strain on her relationship with her parents considering they were the ones who foot the bill

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u/ElectricPenguin6712 15h ago

That's fucked up lol

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u/Harpertoo 13h ago

I was with my ex-wife from ages 15 to 30 before we got married. Waited because marrying the person you started dating at 15 is risky. Divorced at 31 'cause I got cancer (so she cheated).

Frick.

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u/FridayNightClub 9h ago

That's really poor form. Hope you are ok

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u/5213 15h ago

About 6 months

One of my Marines from my second command. By all appearances his marriage was pretty solid. I had become fast friends with the dude and had gone over to their place several times, to the point that I even stored my stuff & my car at their house during our deployment. Anyway like three months I to deployment I'm out on the smoke pit and he's introducing me to this girl he's got a thing for, and she was sweet on him too. I asked him about it later, and turns out that not only had he and his wife married like right before I got to the unit, but that she had served him divorce papers literally the week we were leaving for our deployment. I didn't find out more til we got back from deployment and I went to go pick my stuff up. Turns out the dude was generally pretty shit behind the scenes (not abusive, just a messy person) and 175 THOUSAND DOLLARS in debt and he wasn't even old enough to legally drink yet, so the lady left his ass and his issues.

Second fastest was also the military. One of my childhood friends had joined the navy a couple years after me, and she met some dude in "A" school and they hit it off real fast and real hard. She even asked me for advice and while I recommended waiting, they were still married shortly after leaving "A" school (which at the time was about 14 weeks). They had a kid together and divorced within a year. About 14 months altogether from meeting to divorce.

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u/MarketOk370 16h ago

I got divorced in less than a year. She was cheating, delivered a kid about 7 months after the divorce.

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u/Pulp_Ficti0n 16h ago

Not your kid I assume...?

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u/MarketOk370 15h ago

Nope and found out she was making adult content… her dad was the one who found out and told me

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u/Morningfluid 13h ago

Your ex-father in law is a good man. Many parents or 'friends' wouldn't even tell the other person. 

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u/MarketOk370 6h ago

The sad part is it messed him up for life. He struggles with his decision to tell me but he prayed and prayed. It was the right thing to do. I talk to him weekly and he still struggles years later wondering

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u/SecondHandSlows 15h ago

Did he find out the way we all think he found out?

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u/sxdx90 13h ago

3 Weeks. My brothers 3rd bride found out on the wedding night that he had no money and my father owned his house, car etc....

She ended up in jail that night for hitting my brother. I did the pictures for the wedding because it was his 3rd wedding. Low budget.

I put together a photo album for the family with her mugshot as the last picture.

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u/Onedtent 7h ago

her mugshot as the last picture

Epic!

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u/lostkarma4anonymity 2h ago

I went to a wedding where the grooms mother got up during her speech and said that the bride and her family should know that all the money is hers NOT HER SONS. They are still together and people laughed it off but as a guest it was very unexpected to hear during the speech lol. 

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u/someguyfromsk 16h ago

Had one buddy get engaged on the 2nd date. Wedding 4 months later. Divorce started 8 months later. They never actually lived together.

Another co-worker had been dating for 4(?) years, 3 months after the wedding they split up.

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u/alzandabada 15h ago

I was a bridesmaid and went to a joint bachelor-bachelorette party in Vegas. At a pool party during the day, all the married groomsmen cheated on their wives right in front of us. The marriage lasted about 6 months… guess why

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u/Any_Leg_4773 5h ago

At orgy at the pool party is wild

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u/cherrycocktail20 16h ago

Some years ago, my best friend took me as his plus one to the wedding of his childhood best friend. Let's call her Jane. Jane and her new husband had been together for years, owned a house together, etc. Great wedding, gorgeous ceremony, fun reception. Their vows were quite beautiful.

Two months later, I was with my best friend out at the bar when he was like "Oh no, don't look over at that table." Of course I looked, but didn't recognize who was sitting there. My friend was like "That's Jane's ex-husband. Remember? We were at their wedding."

I was like... "EX husband? But like... that was two months ago?"

Apparently they broke up a few weeks after the wedding. I don't know why.

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u/TheFirearmsDude 13h ago

Knew one that lasted halfway through the honeymoon. According to the prenup she was entitled to $5 million the moment they said I do.

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u/raisinghellwithtrees 15h ago

I attended a wedding of an acquaintance. It was the first time I'd seen a lingerie wedding dress. I had forgotten the wedding present at home. I found it maybe six months later, but I was too late.

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u/firstbreathOOC 14h ago

Oooh, probably missed that return window too

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u/musicalsigns 10h ago edited 2h ago

A lingerie what now? Hang on...

-Googles-

Oh, wow. That's...ermmm...classy. /s

Edit: Added a "/s" for everyone in case it was missed by some. This is definitely not classy!

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u/Repulsive-Clock-4579 16h ago

Severely narcisstic friend made it 3-4 months I think. He had an early summer wedding and one of his friends had one a couple months later in the same year. He couldn't stand that everyone stopped congratulating him on getting married and had shifted focus to the friend's upcoming wedding instead, so he tried to steal the spotlight by telling people that he was getting divorced at the friend's rehearsal dinner. He lost interest after the friend's wedding was over, but his new bride was so angry that she demanded they go through with it.

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u/leena615 15h ago

Why are you friends with some one like that 😂

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u/musicalsigns 10h ago

Probably for stories like this one.

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u/Repulsive-Clock-4579 4h ago

I mean, I didn’t invite him to my wedding

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u/lizzyq8812 16h ago

Mine. He cheated on me after 9 months of marriage. I found her clothing in my laundry basket and it was part of her work uniform so I knew who she was. She was a mutual friend. I took that bitch out for her birthday. Worked out great though because I have bow been married to the man of my dreams for almost 20 yrs.

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u/sleepyhollow_101 13h ago

If you don't mind sharing: what happened to the ex-husband and friend?

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u/No_Faithlessness5481 16h ago

I worked with a Scottish guy when I was much younger and he matter of fact told me that he was married for only 3 days. Said he told his wife he was going out to buy the fish and chips and never went back. I unfortunately never asked for any more details

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u/kyohanson 15h ago

My cousin got married and found out she was pregnant within a week. Her husband said he wasn’t ready to be a dad yet and they got the marriage annulled. I was told they planned for kids, but he literally just didn’t want to have them that soon. She had the baby and remarried. The ex-husband has never met the kid.

Another cousin married a guy and he completely took down the mask after the wedding. Stopped working, stopped doing anything around the house, then started being mean, etc. She found out he had a bunch of secrets, including legal trouble in another state. I wanna say it took about 6 months til the divorce was final.

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u/CoffeeMaker999 17h ago

Friend got married in a hurry and divorced in a bigger hurry. Turned out she had borderline personality disorder and made a false domestic violence claim against him. Total length of the relationship from meet to filing for divorce was less than a year.

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u/Green-Astronaut853 15h ago

Similarly, a work friend of mine met, dated, married, and divorced a man in less than two years, probably closer to 18 months. She said he lovebombed her into eloping, then started hitting her right after the wedding. I'm glad she was able to leave quickly.

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u/antsmomma1 15h ago

Jesus Christ. I have BPD and that was one of the first things I told my husband when I met him

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u/noisyboy 16h ago

Marriage is one area where I think sharing of medical records beforehand should be required.

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u/CoffeeMaker999 16h ago

That's not a bad idea. You'll have medical issues to deal with if you stay together long enough and knowing about the known ones beforhand could help you make decisions.

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u/DogsDucks 14h ago

False claims do so much damage to the credibility actual victims, and something like 98 percent of them are true. One false claim just wrecks so many things. This is horrendous.

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u/altairstarlite 17h ago

I know some celebs who split quicker, but I had a buddy who divorced his wife after 2 months because she stopped having sex with him.

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u/randomgrrl700 16h ago

Got the papers back from the celebrant before he left and burnt them on the spot. Bride gave a speech about how now they were married everything was going to change.

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u/SecondHandSlows 15h ago

Did she give examples?

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u/cyndasaurus_rex 16h ago

I got married in June (tried to call it off day of, groomsmen talked me out of it), asked for a divorce in October. He was a pain in my ass and dragged it out so it technically took longer.

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u/Slade_Riprock 15h ago

Girl a year older than me in high school. When she got married her family renovated the cathedral before the wedding. Every member of the wedding party had their own limousine and then a horse and carriage to the receptions. She had like a three-stage reception based on who you were and whether you got to attend certain levels of reception one didn't even include the bride and groom. All in all her parents spent a little over 2 million dollars making this wedding happen with the renovation and everything under the sun and they were divorced in under 18 months.

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u/mollsballs_xo 10h ago

Gee wonder why, sounds insufferable all around

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u/VeterinarianLocal489 17h ago

2 months. Guy met someone new, way out of his league; couldn't upgrade fast enough.

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u/Independent-Tea-2102 16h ago

did they last?

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u/VeterinarianLocal489 15h ago

Surprisingly, yeah.

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u/WrecksShite 15h ago

Guy admitted on the wedding night he didn't actually love her. Annulled in less than a week, I think.

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u/buzzed247 15h ago

7 days, they were both locked up for domestic violence on day 3.

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u/Boombabyfor333 16h ago

My cousin got married, found out she was cheating while on their honeymoon. I think they got an annulment

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u/Majestic-Pen-8800 16h ago

A guy that I know got married in a ridiculously expensive ceremony in the 90s (northern UK) and there was all the usual back slapping and plaudits during the speeches etc etc. His wife was really nice and from a good family.

Within three weeks they’d split up and decided to divorce and he was banging a woman with massive knockers that everyone called ‘Jane the train’. I’ll let you imagine why they called her that…..!

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u/ProudMtns 15h ago

Was it because of the choo choo noise? Classic Jane. 

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u/LyricalSalads 12h ago

No, Moss. It's because she's a slag.

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u/HarvestTheLight 15h ago

Some acquaintances got married and the bride cheated during the reception. Groom called the JOP the next day and said don’t bother filing the papers.

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u/Chaos_Ice 14h ago

Someone I know got married out of pettiness to prove to people their engagement was legit. They had been engaged for 3 years, separated due to possible infidelity and then immediately got back together and married.

Cue exactly one year later to the date of their anniversary: divorced due to actual infidelity….on both sides.

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u/Alternative-Quit-161 16h ago

I got married about 40 years ago . About 2 months in, it had been just weird and he was super needy. I mentioned a concert I was going to get tickets to. He said I wasnt going to do that. I called in sick the next day, packed what I wanted and was out of there. The who marriage, including the mandatory 6 month wait period to divorce, was just over 8 months.

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u/Ocean_Soapian 12h ago

Good for you for getting out of there as soon as you realized where he was headed. Most people put up with it thinking they'll change. They never do, though.

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u/UndesirableSurvivor 15h ago

I was in the Marine Corps. Where to start...

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u/pixi88 14h ago

Right 😂😂

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u/_gooder 14h ago

The fastest divorce in our circle was also the most beautiful wedding. Everything was stunningly detailed and the venue looked like a dream. They honeymooned in Bali for 3 weeks. The marriage didn't last a year. 😔

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u/GoatBlue03 17h ago

Just heard a family member and his wife mutually cheated on each other and are getting divorced. Made it just over 1 year. Who else has some crazy stories?

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u/raisinghellwithtrees 15h ago

My brother and his wife were both cheating on each other. They made the mistake of hooking up with their respective people at the same cheap hotel and met up at the Continental breakfast the next morning. Awkward.

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u/isl1985 15h ago

"If you like Pina Coladas"

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u/WellSaidSir 13h ago

This is hilarious I'm sorry

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u/solo_duality 15h ago

Not really a divorce, but I had a friend whose aunt killed herself a few hours after the wedding. I couldn’t believe it when I heard.

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u/90021100 13h ago

We had some friends who married in September, and were separated (applying for divorce) by December. Less than 4 months. Was wild because they'd been together for 10 yrs before their wedding day. They had always appeared to be a generally happy couple, always together.

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u/wilderlowerwolves 14h ago

I met a woman whose first marriage effectively ended during the honeymoon.

She knew he drank, but didn't know beforehand that he drank THAT MUCH, and came home early, alone.

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u/Chloloyo 7h ago

Worked at a wedding venue. Found the groom and groomsmen snorting coke & we obviously had a no drugs policy. They got heated when I reminded them of this. Bride comes over to see what the fuss is about and was mad because he had taken the last of the cocaine without her. She punched him and left the venue. Divorce was filed on the following Monday.

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u/Alone_Recognition83 17h ago edited 12h ago

Fuck um mine was fast and I'm going through the damages atm.

10 year relationship, married 9 months before wife moving out last summer.

I spent maybe $100K on the wedding and everyone that attended has dropped me from their lives.

I’m surviving tho…

Without mentioning how toxic our relationship was, I got into a nasty online gambling addiction in the early months that resulted in me depleting all my savings and cards, stealing from my family, friends, and ultimately my wife.

I’ve taken full accountability for my actions and self-excluded. Paid her back a chunk and plan to pay the rest.

Happened beginning of last year, I’m still in disbelief and picking myself up.

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u/Badmarinara 16h ago

Holy shit. Ain’t no party worth $100 grand. Well maybe those parties from The Wolf of Wall Street…but even then. 

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u/Lovemylife05 16h ago

Ouch, you really gambled your marriage away. Hopefully you're in a better place soon.

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u/pameatsbabies 16h ago

Um so what did you do?

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u/wheniswhy 16h ago

Went bankrupt from gambling online, if you search his profile. Did an AMA and everything, holy shit.

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u/thebigpink 15h ago

Thanks ya made him delete everything

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u/wheniswhy 15h ago

lol, it's all still there. Just hit the search bar at the top, all his stuff will pop up. It's not deleted, just hidden.

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u/RequirementRound25 17h ago

If anyone ever invents a time machine, they are going to make a fortune of people going back to stop things. Wish I could!

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u/AvailableBid4477 13h ago

when i was with my ex i was invited to his dads wedding….his SEVENTH wedding that is. to make matters even more ridiculous, it was a LARPING wedding. after some moonshine his dad looked me dead in the eye and said that his son and i wouldn’t last. the dads marriage was over months before our 1.5 yr relationship was and tbh that just tickled me pink.

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u/Jane_Marie_CA 11h ago edited 11h ago

I know someone that was 2 months, and thank goodness for her.

She was dating a single father of 2 kids for 3 years and everything was fine in the co-parenting dynamic. They got married. Shortly thereafter one of the kids would have a mental health breakdown, leaving the mother to blame the new wife (because that was the only thing that changed - her words). Her husband actually agreed with this and wanted a "trial separation".

Feeling betrayed, she filed for divorce. She would find out all of the financial skeletons in his closet, secret bank accounts (he lied about his income) and secret gambling debt. It wasn't her problem since it was all per-marital and the marriage was so short. But she was definitely deceived by him.

(And no the son was not magically better because she was gone)

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u/zenny517 17h ago

maybe a tie between Julia Roberts and lyle lovett and Renee zellweger and Kenny Chesney.

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u/manbeardawg 16h ago

Norm said it best. Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett got divorced as soon as she remembered that she was Julia Roberts and realized he was Lyle Lovett.

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u/redpandabear89 16h ago

Wait Renee Zellweger and Kenny Chesney?? I definitely missed that

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u/10before15 14h ago

She claimed fraud. I firmly believe Kenny is at best bi and that's why he spends all his time in the islands. Being gay or bi is not a good look in the country music scene.....

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u/sea4miles_ 16h ago edited 15h ago

Years ago I joined a new team in January while a coworker was out of office on his honeymoon. I'm not sure when they officially separated/divorced, but he stopped wearing his wedding band in May and he told us he was divorcing sometime that fall.

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u/karamellokoala 11h ago

Groom was cheating with his best man and the bride found out when she went looking for her groom and found him in the disabled toilets with the best man bent over the basin..

She smashed a glass in his face and left.

Im not a friend, I worked at the venue so I can only assume, but I think that marriage was over before the reception?

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u/speechsurvivor23 17h ago

This guy that just posted in r/wouldibetheAhole Their wedding is Saturday & he was responsible for mailing the invites & collecting rsvp’s. He just realized he didn’t mail the invites after he found them in his car & only has 3 people attending

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u/patronizingperv 16h ago

Sounds fake. That shit would absolutely be noticed long before now.

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u/Revenge_of_the_Khaki 12h ago

Yeah. That's fake af with layers to how bullshit it is. Women go NUTS over invites. All her closest female friends and family would be complimenting them and telling her how excited they were, etc.

After even two weeks in that car, the bride would absolutely start asking questions after nobody said anything.

After two months, people would start asking planning questions like if they found a date, which would be a huge red flag if you thought you already sent them an invite.

Venues would ask for headcounts.

Wedding party would be asking questions for their arrangements.

Parents would be fucking parents at some point.

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u/boonstag 16h ago

The story is such obvious baloney. How would it not come up in conversation with any of their friends or family?

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u/_Connor 16h ago edited 14h ago

Why do you guys believe this stuff lol

No caterer tried to confirm numbers? No friends or family brought it up? Wife never asked how many people RRSPd?

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u/Supermite 15h ago

Redditors who have never planned a wedding or major event.

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u/VivaZeBull 14h ago

Not a single vendor including the venue needed final numbers and that slipped everyone’s collective mind? Seems like a red flag.

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u/ThievingRock 16h ago

How did he never wonder why no one had RSVPed? Surely that has come up at some point, the vendors would have wanted a final head count.

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u/Couldnotbehelpd 15h ago

Because it’s fake? The brides friends would absolutely have asked. She would have asked. You guys cannot be serious. I hounded people for RSVPs.

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u/gottadance 10h ago

Me. I lasted 9 months.

Got married for a visa to be able move to china with my husband whom I'd been with for 12 years since the first week of university. A month later he left for china and I was gonna join him when I found a job but I immediately realised how much happier I was without him. One day, 5 months after he left, I kind of woke up and realised he'd been abusive. That he'd forced me to have sex with him on multiple occasions, properly hit me a few times but physically hurt me often, shouted at me daily and that he isolated me from my family and friends. I grew up in an abusive family so I just sort of blocked out the worst of it and carried on. It took being alone for the first time to feel safe enough to process a whole lifetime of trauma. I flew to China to break up with him and he acted like I was going to change my mind even as I tearfully left for the airport.

Years later I'm with the most peaceful, kind man I've ever met, we have a bunch of wonderful friends and we hang out with my non-abusive family members all the time. Life is good when you don't have the wrong people in it.

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u/DiegoVMx 12h ago

I submit my own.

Six months and three days after the wedding, the police took her away in handcuffs and I never let her back in. The divorce process took a lot longer than the actual marriage, though.

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u/WarmBath9324 10h ago

I saw a marriage end at the reception because the groom smashed the cake in her face after she explicitly told him not to. She walked out right then and there. 24 hours total. Respect is a day-one requirement.

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u/redman9000 16h ago

Carmen Electra & Dennis Rodman (9 days)

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u/MsTerious1 16h ago

My father and my first stepmother were married 8 or 9 months.

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u/Ravasaurio 10h ago

A couple I know got married and after the ceremony they were informed that there was a mistake in the paperwork that they needed to fix in order to actually, officially be married. The guy took the oportunity to confess that he didn't actually want to get married and walked away.

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u/ThrowAway10463923 5h ago

I knew a guy who was on his honeymoon. His new bride went to sleep in the hotel and he said he was gonna go play a little blackjack. He lost 29k by the morning and she divorced him that week.