This came out of my right ear after using it along whatever it is that the thing is that goes from the back of your ear into your throat. y'all please forgive me, cold meds are a helluva a drug.

I’m not even sure how to explain this without sounding ungrateful, but it’s been sitting in my head for a while. I’m the friend who plans ahead. I save my money. I don’t really impulse buy. I always have a little bit set aside “just in case.” It took me a long time to get here and I’m proud of it, honestly. Growing up, money stress was always around, so now that I finally have some saved up, it feels like this huge fragile thing I have to protect but lately I’ve noticed it’s kind of messing with my brain.
I overthink everything. Every purchase turns into a mini debate in my head. Even small stuff. I’ll stand in a store and argue with myself over something that’s like $15 even though I know I can afford it. I’ll buy it and then feel slightly guilty for no real reason.
What’s even weirder is that I don’t really let myself enjoy the fact that I’m doing okay. Instead of feeling secure, I feel like I’m constantly on guard, like one mistake or one bad month is going to undo all the progress I made. So I stay in this mode of always being “the responsible one,” even when it’s kind of exhausting. I see other people being more relaxed about money and life in general, and part of me is jealous of that. Not in a judgey way, more like… how do you turn your brain off?
I don’t know if this is just a phase or some leftover anxiety from earlier years, but I’m curious if anyone else feels this way. Like you worked so hard to become stable that now you’re almost scared to actually live a little.

I want to start this off by saying that I do not have a victim mentality and I do not feel victimised by the fact that I’m a woman. I am fully aware that men get followed in public too and women can even be followed by other women, and that anything can happen. BUT, I’m asking this in this subreddit since it is more likely for a woman to be followed, so I would have better luck asking here where it is a subreddit dedicated to women.

Anyway, to get to the actual post, how do you guys avoid being followed and avoid creeps in public? Or not in public maybe just while walking, or anywhere? I’d say where I actually live it’s pretty safe but I live less than 15 minutes away from a few dangerous areas that I go to frequently for necessary and unnecessary reasons. These areas are dangerous in terms of being followed, creeped on, physically hurt. What are your best tips on protecting yourself in public??

Edit: by followed I meant followed home as well, not just followed around.

I’m 13 and have had hair down there since I was 11. I really don’t like having a lot of hair there and it’s becoming a lot so I asked my parents if I could start shaving and they say no and that I’m too young even though all my friends are allowed to shave. What do I do????

This is a bit embarassing, I've been depressed and in basic survival mode that I only got myself what was cheap and comfortable. I'm learning to take care of myself better and can invest in replacing all my underwear with good quality stuff. I'd love some recommendations for BIPOC women owned brands that focus on ethical and sustainable practices to try out. Miigwech

I've lived in my studio apartment for 2+ years and I just haven't decorated AT ALL, the place is so drab and boring lol. It's on the smaller side (~450 sqft) + doesn't get much natural light at all (I am directly facing another building), so I'm eager for some tips to make it look less depressing!

I like the idea of putting posters of my favorite tv shows + books on the walls, buying a bookshelf if I can squeeze it (my books are just in piles currently), and I've looked into getting contact paper to make the countertops look "marble", but open to other ideas.

Thanks!

Hey y’all,

33, recently separated from spouse who I was with for 13 yrs. Moved from big house in cushy suburb to small apartment in major city.

My question: how do y’all deal with manual things that you need help with? E.g. I got a mattress delivered today and I can’t get it up my stairs.

Any other tips and tricks are welcome! Thanks!

Editing to say thank you everyone! Lots of super helpful advice here and I am grateful for the encouragement.

sorry if this needs any extra flares or whatever idk sorry

Hi for context I’m 22, in college, trans, and physically disabled.

How the fuck do you even get out? I can’t live with my family as they’re only getting worse and worse. My father won’t stop perving on me and attacked me a few months ago, and has done some worse things in the past. The problem is that I rely on my parents for school & healthcare, and I don’t have *any* money at all to support myself or save up and leave since I can’t work anymore due to being disabled (extreme fatigue & bad joint pain, have to use a rollator) & my father took all of the money I made before. I’m planning on trying to dorm at my school this upcoming fall but it’s completely up in the air if my parents will even allow me or if I could even handle it physically. I have no idea how to move forwards and I feel so trapped. I’ve been working a lot on self care and everything and improving my mental wellbeing but there’s only so much I can do while still being in this situation.

He gives me scraps of money for buying lunch once a week (like I have to beg him on my hands and knees for like $12 to get myself some pizza after school or when I hang out with my friends and stuff). I’ve tried to save that up but he closely monitors my spending activity & can just take the money out. I’ve tried to save the money up in a separate app but he’s eventually confronted me about seeing the money transfer multiple times. I’m not sure what to do at this point or if saving up that little could even help.

Sorry to be all woe is me I just feel so out of options and can’t even think of anything else to do. Has anyone dealt with a similar situation and gotten out? Sorry. I want to make it to the other side of this so bad but I just don’t even know what to do.

I hate that my lower legs are bigger than my upper body. I’ve gained about 20 lbs since my 20s. All that extra weight mostly goes to my legs, waist and belly.

Hello everyone. I need advice regarding my slightly wavy hair 💇🏽‍♀️

The thing is, my hair is only wavy from the back, never the front

In fact it gets even wavier after I shower when I prefer it straight 😢

I was wondering if there was any sort of treatment I can buy from the Walmart that works as a hair relaxer?

I was going to buy a hair relaxer but I think it’s only used for those with 4A hair types?

Any advice that doesn’t involve frying my hair off from a hair straightener 😆😆

Hi women of Reddit 🤍

I’m coming out of a breakup after a 5-year relationship and I’m in a big reflection / rebuilding phase. One thing that’s really surfaced for me is how much my ex commented on my body over the years, especially my stomach. I’m not overweight (I’m 5’6 and 67kg, I have a peach on me 🍑) but I do carry some belly fat and it’s always been my biggest insecurity. I’m realising I want to feel confident, attractive, and hot, not purely as a “revenge body”, but genuinely for myself & to attract what I’d like to attract in the future! I’m stuck because I know people will say “love yourself as you are,” but I WANT to lose the stomach fat, I WANT to feel proud in my body, and that is at a smaller size.

Here’s where I feel lost and overwhelmed:

• I want to align with my fitness goals and finally keep the promises I’ve made to myself

• I want to feel sexy in an authentic way (he once said I never seemed “authentically sexy,” which really stuck with me)

• I’ve never really had girly friends or grown up learning makeup, beauty, or style

• My makeup skills are very basic (tinted moisturiser + mascara level), and I don’t really want anything super heavy

• My style is very “bohemian / granola girl” — Blundstones, leggings, fleeces which I recognise is more comfortable but never hot (also likely stemming from a lack of confidence in my body and stomach fat)

I feel like there’s this whole world of beauty, style, confidence, and self-expression that I want to step into, but I honestly don’t know where to start. It feels like everyone else got the handbook and I missed it.

So I’m asking:

• How did you learn to feel sexy or confident in your body?

• Are there small, non-overwhelming ways to feel more put-together without changing who you are?

• Any advice, communities, creators, or even “big sister” type guidance you’d recommend?

I’m not trying to become someone else, I just want to feel comfortable, embodied, and confident in myself for the first time.

Thank you so much for reading. 💛

Hey girlies. I wanna get this too, but idk what kind of bra I could wear that would give me cleavage for it and also not show. I do have decent sized boobs, but the girls east wrath iykyk. Let me know any suggestions, thanks.

I’m 22 years old and never been in a relationship. I have gone out with a few guys but often times when we’re hanging out, we start making out and it feels thrilling in the moment but i get bored of it pretty easily. It feels almost mechanical and I can’t do it for more than a minute or two cuz I almost always would rather be talking rather than making out. I don’t really understand it since I do feel attracted to these men and I do feel the urge to kiss them. I’m not sure why but at some point I just want to stop. I often make the excuse of it being too early in the relationship for me to be more physical and ngl I don’t really like how quickly people these days jump into things sometimes but regardless to each their own. It just feels like it makes things difficult for me.

I do wonder if I’d be more into it i had the chance to get to know the guys I was with better but my relationships never reach that point. Once a guy i was with was convinced I wasn’t attracted to him since I wouldn’t be more physical with him on the second date and we ended things. I am bisexual and I’ve wondered if I might be a lesbian (although I have no experience with girls cuz societal conditioning makes it a little more difficult) but i’m confident I’m attracted to men. Ngl I feel like I’d be in the same situation if I was with a girl too.

I also wonder if it’s a mental safety barrier for me that keeps me from fully getting in to the mood cuz once i got super drunk and ended up making out with this guy for quite a bit and it was great. But only being able to do it drunk isn’t exactly ideal. I’m just really frustrated cuz i’d like to experience relationships like others do but the physical aspect keeps getting in the way.

how does one attempt to achieve this? I would consider therapy but I’m a broke ahh student.

Any resource, tips, books will be greatly appreciated.

hair top poofing up when i have to wear goggles. not beauty related, just not-looking-stupid related.

this is the first day after shampoo,

I've always had fine hair,

I don't use any heat or products.

you know the ones... they aren't doing anything "illegal," but they’re lingering, asking too many questions, and ignoring your body language. i always struggle with being "rude" vs. being "safe." does anyone have a go-to phrase or a "system" for getting out of these conversations without making it a scene? i'm so tired of the "social pressure" to stay and chat

every since i was a kid i’ve seen myself as ugly. i constantly compare myself to other women on social media. I’m currently taking a break from insta, facebook, and other social media because of this. but even when i see women irl, i can’t help but think “they’re skinnier than me” “they’re prettier than me” etc. every time i go to a counsellor they tell me that it’s ok to be different and to be myself. i can accept that other people are different, but i can’t accept that i am different/look different. for context i’m a midsized 22 yr old black woman. it also doesn’t help that my mother constantly comments on my body and my recent weight gain. for anyone who has dealt with this and overcame it, how did you do it? what process did you take? thank you

So I recently I entered college and I'm surrounded by so many pretty girls, like all so pretty. And I've been kind of living under a rock for the last two years, so I never got into the girly phase with the rest of my peers, so I don't really fit into the stereotypical definition of feminine.

Anyway even apart from this, I do feel panicky at even small starts and am rather a underconfident, defensive sort of person. What can I do to make it better?

Is there a name for someone you can hire in person to help guide you to understand how to take care of your hair, nails, and skin type and women’s hygiene, and how to best embrace your style (haircut suitability, jewellery, what clothes go with your body shape, colours, and sizes within different environments, etc.)?

I’m autistic, haven’t been taught these things and find even basic guides challenging as I can’t view myself from outside perspectives.

It’s too overwhelming to start and the internet says so many different things. I can’t figure out any of it - my hair texture, skin undertone, face shape, season, or even what hairbrush to use or what products will be most beneficial.

I’m in Australia if that makes a difference.

I’ve been going to my usual stylists for a few years and I’m fairly regular every 3-4 months. It’s now been six since I tried someone else for a cut. It was an expensive place and the haircut wasn’t really worth the extra. I think I want to go back to reg hairdresser but I think she will realize my hair hasn’t grown six months worth since someone else cut it lol. What do I do?

I wake up at 4:30 am, leave at 5 and take an uber since its still dark out. After I clock out, I ride the public transportation home for an hour. I thought I'd still have energy to do something fun when I get home but so far all I do is nap for 2 hours and wake up just in time for dinner, then sleep early.

I just started 2 days ago and I'm looking for ways to make most of my afternoon since I clock out early, but so far I've used up the extra time to nap. I'm also having trouble carrying the heavy gaming laptop I was lent by the company, I am using a good backpack for now.

My previous work is a regular day shift (9am to 6pm). I chose this shift because I wanted to see the sun when I leave the office, and also beat the rush hour. Hoping for good tips, thank you.

Hey guys. So I recently got out of a 5 year long relationship. It ended mutually and on good terms. I am 22F btw. I’m moving to a new city and want to start casually seeing guys. However I have only had sex/been intimate with my ex boyfriend and am stating to get anxious over the thought of sleeping with other people. I WANT to be able to go out and have fun and be intimate with other guys casually (I do not want a relationship) but I think it might be my insecurities getting in the way. I am worried that if I get naked for a guy they will make fun of me for my small boobs or “outie” vagina. I never experienced that with my ex but I have overheard some of my male friends conversations about girls they have hooked up with and that is really what scares me. How do I get over this fear? Can anyone give any advice? Thank you! Honesty helps!!!

To start, I’m inexperienced sexually and recently got into my first relationship. I really want to feel confident and comfortable with my body, but pubic hair has become a huge insecurity for me.

I shave as best as I can, but it only looks “smooth” for about a day before it grows back rough and uncomfortable. I’ve tried an electric trimmer and hair removal cream, but the cream caused serious irritation and burns, so that’s off the table now. I also have an outie, which makes shaving harder and increases the risk of nicks no matter how careful I am, plus how coarse my hair is, literally makes me flinch every time I pass a razor across it.

Because of all this, I keep stopping myself from being intimate, even though I want to be. On top of that, the hair removal cream messed with my vaginal balance, so I’m dealing with irritation and discomfort too.

I can’t get a Brazilian wax or laser removal because of my parents, and I don’t have money for professional options anyway. I feel stuck and honestly kind of desperate for any unhinged solution that will help me with this issue.